blogging it real

A decent week with 6 out of 8. Mind you, everybody got there or thereabouts.

I'll just update my inconsistency stats for the hell of it and since it's easy to do now. If you missed the explanation the first time they are the number of times a team has alternated from a win to a loss or a loss to a win in consecutive weeks. So most inconsistent are at the top.

Eels 10
Broncos 9
Panthers 9
Titans 9
Raiders 9
Warriors 9
Storm 9
Sharks 9
Tigers 9
Bulldogs 8
Knights 8
Roosters 8
Dragons 7
Sea Eagles 6
Rabbitohs 4
Cowboys 2

So what that basically shows is that the only consistent teams are the ones that lose all the time (Rabbitohs and Cowboys). Everybody else, even the top sides like the Sharks and Storm are as inconsistent as the Warriors, they have just had the odd time where they have won 5 or so in a row compared to the Warriors losing of a few in a row. There haven't been the big winning streaks from many teams except Manly with 7, Dragons with 7, Storm with 5, Sharks with 5, Rabbitohs with 5, and several teams with 4.

I'm going with the home team in 6 of the 8 games but they are the higher ranked teams. For some reason around this time of the year you get lots of upsets (desperate teams I suppose) but then in the last month the upsets dry up a bit. I hope so because I need all the correct picks I can get.

Sea Eagles v Panthers
Sea Eagles by 10
Sea Eagles to get the train back on the rails. Was it a wakeup call last week that they will answer or did they start to realise they just aren't that shit hot afterall?

Storm v Titans
Storm by 28
The Titans confidence will be rock bottom and the Storm will be a bit pissed. Crockett suffering his FIRST EVER loss in a Storm jersey apparently. It should be no contest whatsoever.

Sharks v Dragons
Sharks by 8
There's probably some weird stat that I don't know about like the Sharks not having beaten the Dragons at Shark Park in 6 years or some shit, but they should be too tough for a Dragons team that has been a bit off colour recently, probably to do with the pink shirts they wore.

Cowboys v Roosters
Roosters by 18
At some stage the Cowboys will surely win a game, but probably not this one unless the Roosters take the week off after winning one they weren't supposed to.

Rabbitohs v Warriors
Warriors by 6
The Warriors will be out for some revenge after last time where they refused to tackle and the Rabbits ran them ragged up the guts, outwide, fucken anywhere they liked. The Rabbits could trouble them again if they play an expansive game and handle the ball well but the Warriors must surely have the confidence to come out with the two points.

Tigers v Bulldogs
Tigers by 8
Meow beats woof in this one. The Dogs don't have anybody left in their club do they?

Broncos v Raiders
Broncos by 10
The Raiders will feel like league is easy after last week but should find a team that wants to tackle in this one. Broncos have been very up and down this year and will need to go with the former if they don't want to slide out of the playoffs with a big chasing pack.

Knights v Eels
Knights by 2
I hope so because I really don't like the Eels much. And with the coaches its a bit like the league version of Deans v Henry.

Labels: nrl tipping

Darth's latest offering serves up a big helping of the usual:

- A generic complaint about "Labour's socialist nanny state," without a single policy or alleged instance of socialist nannying being discussed.

- Complaint about proportional representation preventing National from its god-given right to rule alone: "We gag at the obnoxious wheeling and dealing that goes into forming minority government coalitions; and we cringe when we see the compromises which such coalitions entail, and the paucity of decisive governance." It's called democracy, Darth. And I well recall the last time there was a majority government in New Zealand: it brought us Ruthanasia rather than the promised "Decent Society."

- Lengthy quotation to make up column length: check, but this time it's John Roughan rather than the usual contributor, God himself.

- Self-aggrandizement: check, Darth includes himself among "300 Rotorua movers and shakers on Monday". Note to Darth: movers and shakers do not live in Rotorua.

- Blathering about climate change: check, "our next Prime Minister [told] us that it's all very well to be the world leader in climate change legislation but what Labour proposes comes at a hellish expense and without any guarantee of benefit". So, apparently climate change might exist, if John Key tells Darth it does. Otherwise it's a crock, 'cos Owen McShane says so.

- Railing against democracy II: the Resource Management needs "cleaning up" - code for reduced public participation in land use decision-making.

- Trouble with numbers: "Then there was his renewed promise to rein in the bloated Wellington bureaucracy, which under Labour has expanded from 26,000 to 36,000 in five years and which, Mr Key said, would blow out by another 3500 if Labour won a fourth term. This would be dealt with by a natural attrition of between 14 and 20 per cent a year." Great, Darth - the public service should be all-but-gone in 10 years, then. I wonder if anyone will be left to process your Superannuation payments.

Labels: darth george, herald

The thing that impresses me the most about the TARDIS is how the door stays the same size relative to the Doctor as he steps through it. I mean, the rest of the "relative dimensions" stuff is some impressive technology, but that door thing, it's just incredible!

Labels: Dr Who, good technology

NZs Emerging Players squad just won a quadrangular (not allowed to say four-way anymore) tournament in Australia. Being curious as to how our next layer of talent performed I hit the information super-highway in search of some stats. I didn't find any so I've calculated them myself and now present them to you, our loyal readership, for your idle once-over.

This tournament was significant for the return to international action of two much-missed Black Caps, Jesse Ryder and James Franklin. Ryder captained the side, opened the batting and was an extremely useful bowler. Franklin apparently had a successful return but I haven't focussed on the bowling here.

The averages (no strike rates available where I looked):

Ryder - 19.7 from his returns of 27, 4, 31, 20, 0 and 36

Watling - 20.2 from his 3, 35, 21, 19, 23, and 40*

Guptil - 40 from his 8, 26, 112, 65, 4, 24 and 41

Ingram - 28.2 from his 30*, 11, 29, 27, 17 and 27

Broom (the only incumbent) - 31.8 from a return of 0, 23, 7, 94, 5 and 62

Hay - 23.2 from his 3, 21, 44, 43 and 5

Corey Anderson, batting 7, averaged 43 (3 not outs) in his 18*, 73, 24*, 1, 52* o and 4

Labels: cricket

We were stricken without power for about 4 hours last night. Luckily we mustered up a few candles before darkness fell, and I was able to head out for supplies - more candles, a dozen beer, chips, chocolate, and toilet paper.

The beer was the new Speights 'natural' brand, Summit. 12 for $20. Tastes like water and has about the same effect. I still have 9, for sale at a good price if anyone is interested.

I wasn't too upset about the power cut, to be honest, as our usage has surely skyrocketed since the arrival of Lil' Red. The washing machine and dryer are seldom off, and at least one and often two oil-fin heaters run 24/7 so the little guy can enjoy the temperatures he demands.

Warriors at home against the Storm today, should be a good match up. Might be a fight or two, too. My heart says the Warriors have a chance, and also that I should try and go to the game. However, Mrs and Lil' Red might have something to say about me abandoning them for the joys of Penrose for a few hours on a Sunday afternoon.

Staying with League, I see SBW has just buggered off to France for a baguette. Nice. Couldn't have happened to a nicer team than the Bulldogs. Or Les Chien de Taureau, or whatever "Bulldogs" might be in French!

Maybe this means the hapless Dragons will have a chance against the Doggies today. But what chance the Warriors versus the Storm? And what chance of DC_Red attending?

Labels: babies, beer, league, sonny bill williams, storm, warriors

I've been having a bit of a shocker but am not alone there. Going in the high 50% range which is a touch worse than last year. I'm hoping to break 60% but am fast running out of time. Not helped of course by teams following up good wins with awful losses and home teams losing to teams they should beat. There is nothing but a little inside knowledge, some gut instinct and plain old good luck to go on tipping in the NRL. The friday night games (matches of the round) are always the easiest to tip and regularly I and others are 2-0 going into the saturday games and then things tend to turn to shit with say 2 or 3 correct from 6 games being pretty common.

I've actually gone through the teams form records and compiled a list of the most consistent/inconsistent. It's worked out by the number of times they have followed a win with a loss or a loss with a win.

The winner is the Panthers who have alternated 10 times. The most consistent team is the Cowboys who have alternated only twice. Three losses followed by three wins followed by eleven losses. Impressively, consistently shit. Here's the full list.

Panthers 10
Broncos 9 (11 if you count the draw which I'm not)
Titans 9
Raiders 9
Warriors 9
Eels 9
Storm 8
Sharks 8
Tigers 8
Bulldogs 8
Roosters 7
Knights 7
Dragons 6
Sea Eagles 5
Rabbitohs 4
Cowboys 2

So I guess that means good teams to tip for or against are the Dragons, Sea Eagles, Rabbitohs and Cowboys. Bad teams to try to tip are the Panthers, Broncos, Titans, Raiders and Warriors. And the rest aren't much better.

Anyway, this weeks tips are below and follow the link to compare them to Sportsfreak and Leaguefreak.

Broncos v Sharks
Broncos by 8
Broncos won last week and got a right royal telling off from the coach about a shit effort. After all, they only beat the Cowboys. Sharks were a bit fortunate to grind out a win and shouldn't quite have enough to take this one out.

Eels v Cowboys
Eels by 16
The Eels could potentially screw this one up but the way the Cowboys are going you just can't tip them to win anything.

Raiders v Titans
Raiders by 14
Titans on the road, Raiders at home. How cliched is this?

Panthers v Tigers
Panthers by 8
Tigers ended the Bunnies streak last week so are ina touch of form but these two teams have followed wins with losses and losses with wins all year so the form book says fuck all. I'm having a guess and reckon the black pussies beat the ginger pussies.

Warriors v Storm
Storm by 12
This is the sort of game that the Warriors can definately win. They have risen for home games v top sides (provided they have a bit of form) many times before. The only problem is that the Storm are probably 2 or 3 levels above them most weeks. And you'd pick the Storm to win this maybe 7 or 8 times out of 10 so I'll go with the head.

Knights v Rabbitohs
Knights by 10
The Knights have been ridiculously inconsistent and the Rabbitohs have the ability to come home strong and lay points on at a rate of knots, but the loss last week might have just knocked a little bit of their stuffing out.

Roosters v Sea Eagles
Sea Eagles by 6
The Sea Eagles have been playing good footie but against some of the pretenders. This is a chance for them to really crank it up and make a few more people take notice. It still won't matter for shit later in the year though.

Dragons v Bulldogs
Dragons by 8
Well SBW didn't play and their WAS a full moon so that mean't I was fucked. With two Bulldogs suspended and after last weeks effort you'd say no chance for the Dogs. The Dragons though have hit a speed bump with consecutive losses so should lift for this one.

Labels: nrl tipping

Cheers to Jed Lewison for putting this footage together:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8ieHwOm4ljA&eurl=http://www.jedreport.com/

If you have nine minutes to burn and want to see the lunacy of Senator Dithers, check it out.

Christ, how this man's dillusions pass as debate is well beyond me.

Don't ever forget who the Nats areTHEM & US
- CHRIS TROTTER -
Sunday Star Times
Sunday, 20 July 2008

So you're thinking of voting for the Nats? After nine years of the same old faces, you think it's time for a change?

Well, you're not alone. According to the opinion polls, there are about 350,000 people out there who are thinking what you're thinking.

But before you - the 15 per cent of the electorate contemplating a lurch to the right - throw your weight behind the 35 per cent of New Zealanders who make up National's core vote (which will then, with 50 per cent, and wielding unbridled parliamentary power, be free to govern alone for three long years), I would ask you to take a closer look at the people you will be joining.

THE COCKIES: Backbone of the nation; earners of our overseas funds; selfish; insular; and possessed of an indefatigable sense of moral superiority over everyone whose front door looks out upon a street instead of a paddock.

These are the people who, heedless of the enormous biosecurity implications, illegally released the rabbit-killing calicivirus into New Zealand - and then laughed at the efforts of the authorities to hunt down the perpetrators.

The people who, when asked to contribute to the cost of scientific research into how we as a nation might control the amount of methane released into the atmosphere by our cows and sheep, refused point-blank to contribute, branded the levy a "Fart Tax", and got away with it.
The people who have aggressively resisted every government effort to secure legally protected rights of way across the countryside, so that all New Zealanders might enjoy the beauty of our wild open spaces, and who, once again, have got away with it.

The people whose dairy herds befoul our rivers and streams. The people who refuse to pay for the pollution they cause. The people who are bending all their powers towards securing control of our nation's water - even as they make it unfit for our children to drink or swim in.
These are the people you will be supporting when you vote National.

You will also be supporting:
THE RICH: Creators of wealth; makers of jobs; robbers of rights; bastardisers of culture; selfish; arrogant; and possessed of an indefatigable sense of moral superiority over everyone whose income is less than $100,000 per annum.

These are the people who, with the Employment Contracts Act, stripped from hundreds of thousands of working-class New Zealanders the legal rights they had enjoyed for nearly one hundred years.

The people who pocketed the accommodation supplement (kindly supplied by their political representatives) even as their tenants' children went cold and hungry, and the diseases of poverty, long banished from New Zealand society, made a deadly reappearance.

The people who begrudge every cent of tax they are asked to contribute. The people who care nothing for the cultural wealth of our nation being fairly distributed. The people who regard education principally as a means of preserving the advantages of their class. The people who think our health system wastes far too much money on all the stupid, lazy and poor people cluttering it up.

These people, too, you will be supporting when you vote National. And then there are:
THE REACTIONARIES: Defenders of the faith; upholders of decent family values; sadistic; bigoted; deranged hankerers after a world that - thankfully - has long since passed away.
The people who think prisons are the solution to the problems that fill them. The people who resent having to treat women, gays, ethnic minorities and the disabled as human beings. The people who think anyone who doesn't laugh at a racist joke is an example of "political correctness gone mad". The people who supported the Springbok Tour, thought Vietnam and Iraq were "noble causes", and opposed New Zealand becoming nuclear-free. The people who deny climate change.

Yes, these are the people you will be joining when you make the big switch. The people who have opposed every single progressive reform that New Zealand has ever undertaken - yes, every single one.

Of course, no one can stop you joining them.

It's still a free country.

But, please, before you vote, ask yourself: "Is this the company I want to keep?"

Labels: national

Well, for the past 9 days I've preferred parenting to blogging (and working for that matter), as we welcomed Lil' Red into the world.

He's a man of strong opinions, particularly when it comes to milk, which he devours in vast quantities. Like last night, when he was only satiated after four hours of feeding. Institutionalized gluttony in my view.

As his name suggests, he will be a red if his father has anything to do with it (Hat tip to Richard Dawkins on that one). Various shades of green might also be acceptable.

Well, better get back to it. There's nappies to wash.

Labels: babies, nappies, Richard Dawkins

I’m heading to New York in a few minutes.

But before I enter that mad mad country, one where Christian morals are the only way into the army and yet it is just so very easy to pull a train with three waitresses in any given bar, let’s talk about Senator Dithers latest fuck up.

Word leaked that while Washington goes on and on about Iran being the pinnacle of the axis of evil, trade has increased ten-fold under the Bush administration.

Despite a soft embargo against Iran, Washington has made exceptions in “agricultural products and medicine…to a segment of the population that we want to reach out to, we want to work with them to integrate them into the world economy and become partners in the future.”

So of course this means increasing exports in cigarettes, bras, fur clothing, perfume and military apparel. I’m really straining to find a way of fitting military apparel and cigarettes into food and medicine.

But for McCain, it makes good sense why cigarettes are going to Iran. “It’s one way to kill them,” he says.

Then in the same breath he boasts of his 28-year personal smoking embargo, unlike Obama who has only been off the cancer sticks for a little more than a year.

There is a lot rolled into this one.

1) Why is the U.S. exporting such things to Iran?
2) Why is McCain allowed to walk around freely in the streets while joking about the deaths of Iranians?
3) How in fuck’s name can supporters of the G.O.P. stand to allow this tool as a presidential candidate? And on the same note, why, American public, is there not outrage in the streets over the smart-mouthed, stupid-ass comments this man makes on a weekly basis?

This is what we’re up against.

Somebody here has become a dad, somebody has become an uncle and somebody else has become the second best looking blogger.

Meanwhile Tony Veitch went from being an annoying prick to being a complete knob in the space of a week. He has the opportunity to move back to being merely an annoying prick but I am becoming concerned that he will become a disgraceful poster child for redemption before admission.

So anyway, what's going on in Korea?

Well, the North Koreans are shooting South Korean women for crossing a line. That's right, a Korean women on a tour to Mt Geungang was out for a stroll, got shouted at and freaked and ran, and was then mown down. I bet the shithead that pulled the trigger is mighty proud of himself (no, actually he probably is).

Hyundai also have to suck it up as they have been running tours there for quite some time and it seems that these types of 'border crossings' happen regularly with South Koreans detained and told off.

Labels: babies, Korea, north korea, south korea, tony veitch

Is it just me or is the mainstream media in this country getting weirder and weirder?

Leading TV3 tonight is a story on a guy who faked his own death. The story was fairly old, it seemed the only news was that he has now been named. Whoopdy shit, this is a human interest story, albeit it a fairly sad, sick twisted one.

This bumped the DEATH OF A POLICE OFFICER ON DUTY (something which happens on average about once every 5 years) to the second news item.

Are they taking the piss or what?

Labels: media, police, tv3, wtf?

There I was just telling an 18 year old (who was telling me they'd never been ID'd) in the weekend about how I only get ID'd in liqour stores by middle aged woman when low and behold 24 hours later there I am buying some booze and I get asked for some ID by a lady who looked about 45.

I'm 32 years old for fucks sakes!!! I know I look quite a bit younger (although I have students who think I am in my 40s) but do I honestly look 17? I think not. I have ten day old stubble, am over 6 foot tall and look like Brad Pitt only way better looking. Maybe that's why they employ middle aged women because they think everybody looks like they've just climbed off a tricycle.

At least the lady in the video store cheered me up by telling me what great choices I had made with my DVD picks. She also has wonderful taste.

Labels: ID, liquor, women

Mark Richardson is a better cricket player than cricket thinker. He is way off the mark comparing Paul Collingwood's decision to appeal for a run-out of Grant Elliott to Brendon McCullum's run-out of Muralitharan. (Murali had left his crease again, after completing a run that had seen his partner Sangakarra make a century, while the ball was still in play.)

Grant Elliot had no opportunity to preserve his wicket because he was taken out of play by an opposition player.
Murali had every opportunity to preserve his wicket by simply remembering the rules of cricket.

There is a world of difference Rigor.

Labels: cricket, sportsmanship

Rt Hon John Banks
Minister of Crime & Lord Mayor of Auckland
The Beehive
Wellington

2 Feb 2009

"It is with great pleasure I announce a contract for the first Crown Crime Enterprise in the Manukau Ward of my beloved Greater Real Auckland Mega-Metropolis Area Region ('GRAMMAR')," his Worship said.

The Crown has entered into a contract with the previously-feared Wu Tang Triad of Botany Downs to flight crime in the area.

"This is an important first step in reducing crime in Auckland/GRAMMAR, so cruelly abandoned under nine long years of Labour government.

"By scrapping Working For Families, and diverting money into a series of Crown Crime Enterprises (CCEs), we will deliver significant benefits to those New Zealanders who remain in work," the Minister continued.

Lord Banks said the Wu Tang Triad would fight crime on a maximum 98% of the budget previously wasted by the socialized Police force, but would only be paid upon delivery of wanted criminals, or their heads, to local "Kiwi Incarceration Enterprises" (KIEs), previously known as prisons.

"Wu Tang will later be joined by other crime-fighting groups, such as the the Mighty Purebred Mob Inc., and compete to capture criminals (or their heads) in the Manukau region," the Lord Mayor of Auckland/GRAMMAR and senior government minister stated.

"Together with head of the State Law and Order Restoration Commission (SLORC), Tau Henare, Minister for Roads, Tony Friedlander, and Prime Minister for Life, HRH John Key, this is another example of the National party delivering on its promise of efficiency in these lean times."

"Crown Crime Enterprises may be fully privatized in the near future, to allow those New Zealanders who remain in paid work to contract their own security, according to their own needs, which will ensure safe journeys for all, along highways paved with good intentions and low taxes, to your nearest Crown Health Enterprise (CHE), or to visit a relative in the nearest KIE," the Lord Mayor explained to an adoring audience outside a liquor store on Great South Road.

"We will stop at nothing in paying large American corporations to build new KIEs in every community, and since we scrapped the Resource Management Act (RMA), that's a lot easier than it used to be," added the Minister for the Environment, and Minister for Tight Neckties, Nick Smith.

Labels: auckland, crime, john banks, national, nineties all over again, police, wu tang clan

Last night TV3 carried two non-truck related politics stories, both fed to them by "poor little rich party National." First, John Key had a whine that someone had put a mildly critical video about him on youtube. Cry me a river. (TV3 anxious to point out link to said video, previously unheard of, available through its site). Second, National complained that members of the public were sending them mass-printed postcards critical of privatization. This correspondence from the public was met with threats of litigation from Bill "bring back the Birch" English. Nice.

Labels: john key, media, national, politics, TV news, whiny bitches

That's what it will be if the truck drivers' tax rebellion produces the "paralysis" (John Campbell, 3 July 2008) the media is salivating for.

People are being told to stay home. Right, and at whose expense would this unscheduled day off be? If it's mine, the truck drivers are stealing my annual leave. If it's my work, they're stealing my employer's money - via my salary - as surely as if they embezzled it directly.

People are being told to go in to work after 11 am. Right, and if I work in a shop, who is going to serve the customers earlier in the day? Oh, that's right, said customers won't be there ... to the detriment of hard-working business owners and their employees. Again, the truck drivers might as well just reach right into the tills and steal the morning's cash taking, and siphon the eftpos sales directly into their fucking diesel accounts.

Those with early morning flights are being told to consider staying at airport hotels overnight. Right, and to which trucker should I send the invoice for said accommodation? What that's ... you expect it to come out of my post-tax salary? Get to fuck! Perhaps if I don't like paying the GST on said hotel bill, or the taxes of fuel I will use to get there, I could just park my car sideways across a couple of lanes of the airport motorway, and walk to my departure gate?

Bus passengers are going to be ejected on the city edge and told to hoof it, regardless of (dis)ability or weather. And it would be a long fucking hike from John Andrew Ford on Gt North Rd to my workplace.

And the Police seem entirely complicit in this terrorizing of the civilian population.

Where's that pepper spray when you need it, you spineless fucks? Break into the first 10 truck cabs that appear in the downtown convoy and break a few fucking heads, I say.

If it's good enough for the proletarians it's good enough for tax rebels in the petite bourgeoisie.

Labels: crime, dickheads, police, terrorism, trucks, War on Terror

Prime, TV1 and TV3 all led with "the Jimmy Cowan story" last night.

That story being: "second-rate employee of high-profile company has been on a few benders lately, and made an arse of himself."

The poor bastard was absolutely surrounded by cameras and sanctimonious journalists upon emerging from the NZRFU offices (which look a bit like a pre-dairy boom milkshed actually).

He was "suitably" contrite for media purposes, but might well have asked the lazy fucking hacks whether they've ever been out on benders themselves. And whether said benders have ever led to embarrassment and brushes with the law. And, if so, whether their employers insisted they go teetotal.

Get a grip, people: his is only a "rolemodel" (TM) in so far as he can catch a ball, run with it, pass it (and stop opposing players from doing same). What he does in his spare time is none of his employer's business, providing it does not significantly affect his ability to work.

And it's none of the public's fucking business whatsoever.

Labels: drunk, graham henry, media, milksheds, rugby, sanctimony

The thing that impresses me the most about the TARDIS is how the door stays the same size relative to the Doctor as he steps through it. I mean, the rest of the "relative dimensions" stuff is some impressive technology, but that door thing, it's just incredible!

Labels: Dr Who, good technology