blogging it real

Look Ivan, you don't need independent observors having a look round the club this week. The balls ups were made long ago.

You (I know, you were advised by some idiots as well) dunted ALL our halves and picked a guy who should have been used as a bit part player in an energency, and for some mentoring. As a side note we bought Kemp thinking he'll run in 20 tries for us but it's a shame we put a winger into space about as often as Brent Todd scored tries. Although our outside defenders knopw how to put opposition wingers and centres into space so maybe we could have got a tip from them. I feel sorry for the guy, and Ivan, you should be ashamed of the position you put him in. All the plonkers out there are saying, gee, Kemp was a bit of a flop. Funny how he'll run in a dozen tries a season for anybody else in the comp.

And then you proceeded to play the most boring ineffective attacking style I have ever laid eyes on from a team I support. They average 16.39 points per game. The worst ever attacking Warriors side was the 2000 team who averaged 16.38. So if they score 16 or less points v the Storm they will take bottom spot. The thing is that this side is nowhere near as bad on paper as some sides we've had in the past but he took a team that has been getting progressively more boring in the past 1 to 2 years and completely castrated it.

Three tips
1) Make sure you have nimble halves that can run, pass and kick a bit.
2) Teach the backline some moves.
3) Tell your loose forwards to get wider and stop playing like props.

There, all that was for free.

and if I see our boys doing wrap around moves, our loosies logging it up and looking for a hit and spin offload and chip bombs to Vatuvei next year I swear to god, I'll go apoplectic.

I'm just saying all this stuff because I care.

Labels: nrl, warriors

My picks for this weekend...
Rabbitohs v Panthers
Panthers by 4
The Rabbitohs might pull out the old bounce back result after getting a 50 point hiding last week but even against a mediocre Panthers team I think they'll fall just short.

Knights v Raiders
Knights by 8
Home ground advantage all the way.

Dragons v Sea Eagles
Dragons by 4
People thought last weeks game v the Bulldogs was the Sea Eagles showing the NRL that they are back. But this will be another checkup at the clinic. Win this and you can bring them back into premiership contention, lose it and the jury will remain out.

Warriors v Bulldogs
Warriors by 8
God only know what's making me do this but they threatened to breakout last week where one shit house pass cost them a 14-0 lead and what was probably the match. They play a crap style, have crap coaching, and have the worst halves in the comp but it's now or never. Warriors by 8 or Bulldogs by 36. In a moment of lunacy I pick the former.

Titans v Eels
Titans by 4
The Eels are hanging in there with 5 of their last 6 games being decided by 7 points or less and this should be more of the same. They'll miss Hayne though and that should consign them to a season ending loss.

Looking at the ladder you could loosely group teams into the following categories:

Serious Title Contenders
Dragons (26), Bulldogs (24) and Storm (23)

Pretenders (but lock them in for the playoffs)
Titans (24)
Sea Eagles (20)

Iffy Top 8 (making up the numbers if they do make it)
Cowboys (20)
Panthers (20)
Knights (20)
Broncos (20)

Wooden Spoon Battle Extraordinaire (these teams are mud)
Raiders (16)
Rabbitohs (15)
Warriors (15)
Eels (15)
Tigers (14)
Sharks (12)
Roosters (10)

Teams with red points are sides that have 2 points coming up for the bye whereas all other sides will have to earn them the hard way.

On the Warriors, after last weekends effort they now have their worst points per game stats in their 14 and a half year history and the lowest average since the Rabbitoh side of 1999.

That, ladies and gentlemen is how negative Cleary's coaching style is and how hopeless our halves are.

Labels: cleary, fucking hopeless, jones, nrl, warriors

The Warriors mill that is.

I won't go into detail about what's wrong as it's pretty fucking obvious. They have no attack whatsoever. OK, I'm exagerrating a bit. Sometimes they can pull out a close range barge over try and sometimes they can chip bomb to Vatuvei and score but that's it. Between the Warriors, Sharks, Roosters and Eels they should be convicted for crimes against their fans and the sport of rugby league.

And here's the statistical proof ... 10, 14, 12, 12, 11, 14, 17, 22, 16, 10, 26, 26. Those are their scores this year starting with the latest and heading back to the start of the year where they came in with a bit of confidence before Cleary got them playing Cleary ball as opposed to Warrior ball.

They are gone for 09. The top 8 has already worked itself out (Dragons, Broncos, Bulldogs, Knights, Cowboys, Storm, Panthers) with one from the Titans and Sea Eagles to take the 8th spot.

The rest will scrap it out to see who can deceive their fans into thinking they can play football and deserve to keep their coaching and playing spot for next season.

Labels: nrl, warriors

In his just released autobiography the Warriors Steve Price has given an excellent insider's account of the behaviour of the former CEO and heavy Mick Watson:

Mick may have been ambitious but I didn't like the way he was talking about some of the players that were already at the club. I had seen him talk to Francis acting as if they were good mates and I couldn't help but wonder: 'If you're saying that to me about Francis, what are you saying to the other guys about me?'

I had heard a number of things about PJ Marsh and how he was sent packing from the club when he really didn't want to be. Mick would tell me that PJ was causing problems, but the players said otherwise. Then there was Vinnie Anderson. He had just returned from the Kiwi tour of Great Britain when all of a sudden he started being called out of training to meet with Mick. Two weeks later he was off to St Helens in England. Before he left he was quoted in the media saying, 'I'll never play for the Warriors while Mick Watson is in charge'. Mick would tell me that there were a number of issues with Vinnie — one being that he was told not to tour with the Kiwis in 2004 so he could get over an injury and have a full pre-season for the club — and that he didn't have the right attitude, but that didn't make sense to me. I had started to become good friends with Vinnie and he loved being at the Warriors, loved living in New Zealand and loved his team-mates. Here was Mick telling me otherwise and it didn't add up.

Eventually Mick stopped talking to me as well. Rumours started circling through the media about how I was homesick and wanted to return to the Bulldogs. People would call me to ask if the rumours were true and I had to tell them they were way off the mark.

It was exactly the same cycle that had taken place time and time again. I had heard similar stories about Ali Lauiti'iti and even Stacey Jones. Once the rumours began about me I knew I was next on the chopping block.

I just didn't like the way he went about his business. There was no trust in the place and I could understand why.

Even the front office staff were frightened of him. Mick is quite an intimidating guy when you look at the size of him and he can be quite aggressive.

Mick Watson successfully drained the club of some of its top talent and several forgetable seasons followed.

It was bloody tough for fans to accept - (admittedly less so for Yamis).

Interesting though how accurate a portrayal of the clubs woes was being written by outsiders, at the time.

Anyway, my tip for tonight: Kiwis.

Although the King just suggests flipping a coin.

From the same article, imagine if an Indian cricket sports great said the equivalent about Andrew Symonds.

Of another of the Kiwi danger men, giant winger Manu Vatuvei, once a regular target of opposition kickers because of handling frailties, Lewis said the New Zealand Warrior looked to have put those woes behind him and was exuding plenty of confidence.

Vatuvei was in rampaging form against England last weekend, notching a World Cup recording-equalling four tries in the match.

"Without being insulting, he's a gorilla when he's out there on the field," Lewis said.

We'll just take it as a compliment.

But the most satisfying piece of journalism I've read lately was a story regarding the freakish mystery of the numerous shoes, complete with detached and decomposing feet, that keep washing up in Canada and the northern US.

Seven feet in the last two years....and check out the quote.

The discovery of dismembered feet, all in buoyant sneakers, has been headline-grabbing world news for the last year....

Dr. John Butt, a forensic pathologist and former chief medical examiner in Alberta and Nova Scotia, said earlier this year that finding the feet in the same area is difficult to explain, although that's not the case with the condition of the feet.

Butt said a foot and leg will separate naturally, in water or in the ground, given enough time.

Gold.

I know the media is accused of focusing too much of its coverage on crime and death, and it undeniably does, but to be fair to them there have been some damned interesting crime stories out there lately.

Like Germany's Woman without a Face.

In April 2007, Michèle Kiesewetter, a 22-year-old policewoman from an elite drugs squad, was taking a lunch break with a colleague in their BMW patrol car in Heilbronn, nearly 100 miles from Bad Kreuznach. Two people climbed into the back seat and shot the officers from behind, killing the woman and seriously injuring her 25-year-old partner. The assailants struck so quickly their victims had not even drawn their weapons.

As dozens of green-uniformed officers, carrying a smiling portrait of their murdered colleague, paraded at her funeral, the case shocked and moved the country. It also sparked one of the largest criminal investigations in German history - with results that at first puzzled, then stunned, the investigators.

The only clue was microscopic traces of DNA, found on the centre console and the rear passenger seat of the BMW. And when the samples were finally fully secured, tested and compared with Germany's central crime database nearly three months later, there was an extraordinary match - from two quite different murder scenes stretching back a decade and a half. The 'Woman Without a Face' had, it seemed, struck again.

To the Canadian film producer who found his latest creation came to life - unfortunately his art wasn't no Pinocchio - but a film script about a stranger who gets lured to a garage and cut to pieces.

Meanwhile, in New Zealand our law breakers don't seem to understand the most fundamental basics of committing crime - trying to get away with it.

Stacey Bennett knew she was too drunk to be driving - so she called the police...

"She stopped outside the Northern Dairy (Stratford) and used a pay phone to call police to request assistance," Prosecuting Sergeant Lewis Sutton said.

Bennett told police she had been drinking and had decided she was too drunk to carry on.

"Police arrived at 4.46am to find the defendant asleep in the driver's seat with the headlights on and the keys in the ignition," Mr Sutton said.

Nor him.

Labels: crime, rugby league, warriors

They say Labour is down and out, that they'll need a miracle if they are to stand a chance of still governing post-election.

Well, Labour did the best they could and rounded up the services of the Little General.

But forget Labour, forget the polls, the election even, cause Stacey's got much bigger news.

Kiwi halfback of the century Stacey Jones will play for the Warriors next season.

Three years after ending his record 238-game career at Mt Smart Stadium, the 32-year-old today revealed he has signed a one-year contract to resume his playing ties with the club.

Jones said an approach by Warriors coach Ivan Cleary and a taste of top-level football with the All Golds last month had rekindled his desire to again play for the Vodafone Warriors.

"It's a huge decision but I'm so excited about what's ahead," Jones said.

Join the club - bring on 2009.

Labels: league, premiership 2009, warriors

Much cheering here from the team at BIR. I got to five or six home games this year, including the awesome win over the Storm in the, err, storm ... A rational tipster might say it's a "bridge too far" for you against Manly tonight. Mind you, the same tipster might have been picking Cronulla over Melbourne. (Come to think of it, I was informally picking Cronulla too).

But, moving right along, it would be great to have a grand final free from the malevolent influence of Sydney teams, so I'm picking the Warriors. This is totally a heart-over-head decision, but fuck it. If they play really well, they'll win.

Labels: nrl playoffs, nrl tipping, warriors

Freakin awesome. The first time the number 8 team has ever beaten the first placed team in the 10 year history of the Mcintyre playoff system that that has happened.

I'm so stoked. Jumpin round the house, making my daughter cry, annoying my wife. Good times.

The playoff system is really, really silly with too many unfair anomalies and a format that makes it difficult to understand.

They should just go with the AFL format where 1 plays 4, 2 plays 3, and the winners get week 2 off. 5 plays 8, 6 plays 7 and the losers are eliminated. The winners progress to week 2.

You would get 4 games that are relatively even and its simple as hell to understand with no real possibility of "unfair" matchups in week 2.

Anyway, something to worry about for next year.

We're off to week 2!!!!

Labels: mcintyre system, nrl, playoffs, warriors

We were stricken without power for about 4 hours last night. Luckily we mustered up a few candles before darkness fell, and I was able to head out for supplies - more candles, a dozen beer, chips, chocolate, and toilet paper.

The beer was the new Speights 'natural' brand, Summit. 12 for $20. Tastes like water and has about the same effect. I still have 9, for sale at a good price if anyone is interested.

I wasn't too upset about the power cut, to be honest, as our usage has surely skyrocketed since the arrival of Lil' Red. The washing machine and dryer are seldom off, and at least one and often two oil-fin heaters run 24/7 so the little guy can enjoy the temperatures he demands.

Warriors at home against the Storm today, should be a good match up. Might be a fight or two, too. My heart says the Warriors have a chance, and also that I should try and go to the game. However, Mrs and Lil' Red might have something to say about me abandoning them for the joys of Penrose for a few hours on a Sunday afternoon.

Staying with League, I see SBW has just buggered off to France for a baguette. Nice. Couldn't have happened to a nicer team than the Bulldogs. Or Les Chien de Taureau, or whatever "Bulldogs" might be in French!

Maybe this means the hapless Dragons will have a chance against the Doggies today. But what chance the Warriors versus the Storm? And what chance of DC_Red attending?

Labels: babies, beer, league, sonny bill williams, storm, warriors

Broncos v Eels
Broncos by 8
Broncos a bit ordinary at times recently and an Eels team which has the ability to do OK but have to stick with the home town heroes.

Raiders v Sea Eagles
Sea Eagles by 10
A potential upset here. But the Sea Eagles should be pumped to not lose two in a row.

Storm v Bulldogs
Storm by 6
Another game which could throw up an upset especially in SBW looks to really dominate. Hell though, the Storm are legends in their own lunchtime.

Cowboys v Panthers
Cowboys by 10
Strictly going with venue here. If it was in the mountains I'd be going the other way.

Knights v Warriors
Knights by 16
Fuck. Warriors just don't have a very good team. I have to question what the fuck has happened in the off season to take a top 4 team with one more years experience under their belts to a side which now looks like it'll be lucky to be sniffing the 8 late in the year. I know they are missing McKinnon and Price but other teams miss key players at times and they don't concede 31 points a game (the next worst is 25.6 by Souths). Last year they only let in 18 pointsa game and if you look at the figures that count defence is clearly more important than attack in winning you games. The Warriors have scored 7 more tries than the Sharks but are 8 places below them on the ladder.

They need to find that hot streak soon or they'll be pulling out the calculators of doom before long.

Rabbitohs v Dragons
Dragons by 4
I would early love the Bunnies to win this and the erratic efforts by the Dragons could see it. However the white shoed show ponies should have a bit too much class (if you could call being a c*nt 'classy').

Sharks v Titans
Sharks by 4
Another one that could go either way. I have to look at venue though to help me with this one.

Roosters v Tigers
Roosters by 6
A possibly entertaining game here. Roosters were clinical last week albeit a lot from kicks. Tigers responded to rocket from Sheens. Roosters should close it out though (I hope they don't)

Labels: nrl tipping, warriors

There's been a lot in the sports media in the past few weeks about the Warriors inability to win away from home. I think it's been blown out of proportion somewhat by WHO they have been playing. Their draw so far has been abysmal. There isn't a team in the competition that could claim to have had a worse draw than Storm, Eels, Sea Eagles, Knights, Bulldogs, Cowboys and Titans and the four hardest in that lot have all been away. They've played the other 3 teams that made the top 4 last year and this years current front runners.

I've done a bit of digging to look at the records of each team at home and here they are...
Melbourne: 34 wins from 36 games (we were hardly going to win that were we?, that home record is verging on the unbelievable in a competition this even).

Manly: 17 wins from 19 (not as long as Melbourne's but becoming about as impressive).

North Queensland: 13 wins from 19 (Not unbeatable but then, it's a better home record than most and the Warriors have now lost 6 straight there so it isn't just this Warriors team that has a problem there with our last win being in round 4 of 2002).

Gold Coast: 5 from 5 at their new home ground (Skilled Park) and 7 from 7 going back to last year.

So yeah, combined those teams are 71 wins from 81 games for a 87.6% win rate. That's the stuff legends are made of in a competition where the average home win/loss ratio last year was 55/45.

The Warriors draw for the rest of the year is unsurprisingly much friendlier. They face several of the more difficult teams at home and their road journeys aren't quite so bad although none are ever easy.

Next up they are home to the Raiders who won't be a push over, then they have the 2 points from the bye and then are away to the Panthers. Contrast their next three away opponents home records in recent times and things look a bit more winnable.

Check it...
Penrith: 4 wins from 17
Newcastle: 5 wins from 14
Sharks: 1 win from 9 (that's right, the Sharks have now won just 1 of their last 9 home games).

So those three teams have a combined home record (from my selection) of 10 wins and 30 losses, a 25% win rate.

The Warriors do sorely miss McKinnon and Price though and we can add Ropati who was playing well and now probably Vatuvei for a bit. So the road games will be 50/50 at absolute best but they'll sure as shit by better odds than the 10/90 ones we've been facing.

Labels: nrl, warriors

Pre-script? This is our 993rd post. We intend on making the next 8 the same as the other 992. Real and nothing but the real.

So Paris Hilton is off to the LA Hilton in June. 23 hours with nobody to bother you. Plus three square meals brought along at the appropriate times.

Man I'd catch up on some reading. I assume she can read.

Paris Hilton heads for real 'simple life' in jail
By Steve Gorman
Paris Hilton was sentenced to 45 days in jail for violating probation.
LOS ANGELES - Hotel heiress Paris Hilton, star of the reality TV show The Simple Life, will really be going back to basics when she checks into a Los Angeles County jail next month to do time for violating her probation.

Unless her lawyers win an appeal, she will forsake her designer clothes, cell phone and other accouterments -- along with her freedom and privacy -- for an orange jumpsuit and a small, spartan cell with twin bunks.

"She's going to be assigned a two-person cell, and most likely have another inmate in the cell with her," Los Angeles County sheriff's spokesman Steve Whitmore said today, adding Hilton, like all inmates, would be confined to her quarters 23 hours a day.

She will be allowed out of her cell once a day for an hour to shower, stretch her legs, use the telephone or watch television in a jailhouse day room, he said.

The cell -- 2.4 metres wide by 3.7 metres deep, with an 2.4 metre ceiling -- contains "two bunks, a table, a sink, a toilet and a sliver of a window." Hilton's cellmate, if she gets one, will be another individual serving time for a serious driving infraction or other nonviolent offense, he said.

While the facility houses roughly 2,200 women, Hilton will be segregated from the general population in a "special-needs" unit designed for such high-profile prisoners as celebrities, former police officers and public officials, Whitmore said.

Hilton will get three meals a day, all taken in her cell, but like the jail's furnishings, nothing fancy -- cereal or yogurt with fruit for breakfast, a sandwich or hamburger for lunch, and a hot meal such as chicken for dinner.

"She'll be given the same food that is served to every inmate in the jail, he said.

The jail's schedule also will make it hard for Hilton to keep the late hours she is accustomed to. Breakfast is served between 6 and 7.30 am, and lights are turned out at 10 pm

Whether Hilton will serve all 45 days of her sentence is unclear. Under state sentencing guidelines, inmates receive one day credit against their sentence for each day they serve. This means Hilton would effectively complete her term after 22.5 days in jail, unless the judge's order stipulates otherwise.

She also could get out early due to overcrowding, as was the case with actress Michelle Rodriguez of the TV show Lost, who was reported to have served just four hours and 20 minutes of a 60-day sentence for a probation violation last May.
- REUTERS

Shucks, 4 hours and 20 minutes of a 60 day sentence?? Hardly enough time to even get beaten up in the showers. Or worse.

Went to watch the Warriors on Saturday night. Without a doubt the worst 80 minutes of League I can recall seeing since I was playing for Te Atatu in the under 6's in 1982.

Forget signing Tate for 450,000 dollars. You actually need decent halves before you can go spending up on backs who will never get any decent ball.

Sack Witt asap and spend the 450,000 plus his salary on somebody with a decent running and passing game.

All we ever do is
a) bomb for the corners on the last tackle
b) shovel the ball along the backline
c) put runners in motion with the same move that Jones used (very successfully) to free up space out side.

But there just never seems to be anything spontaneous or creative from our number 6. Rovelli has his moments in the 7 jersey but he needs some help. And christ did Rovelli have a shocker on Saturday. What the fuck were those grubber kicks in behind the line early in the count with not a single chaser? You wouldn't expect that from a reserve grade halfback in club football and even coaches in shitty grades I played in would have screamed out "what the fuck was that?!".

Nevermind, at least the Blues are a cohesive unit.

Labels: blues, paris hilton, prison, te atatu, warriors

Should I be Concerned?

Or should I go back to drinking bourbon and coke from my milkshake glass?

Maybe she has a spamalker?

Anybody played texas holdem' poker? I just earnt 5$ for my daughters piggy bank towards her university education which should be about $12,000 a year and counting in 2023 and promptly lost $10 of my own money. Good game. I recommend playing low stakes but high buy ins which makes the game more fun but less riding on them. You can get a few games in in the night and only face losing 5 dollars per game over the course. If you play higher stakes of say 10 dollars then people play more conservatively and the games drag out over hours and you end up with folks watching for an hour and a half with nothing to do. For example one game of 10 dollar buy ins would go for 2-3 hours whereas 5 dollar buyings might last an hour and a half and then you can rejoin.

A bit like betting on an Aussie Super 14 team. You lose your ten bucks and have to watch it go down the shitter for 80 minutes.

Seriously, next time NSW or the Reds rock up to Auckland or Christchurch go to the bank and raise a loan of 10 million dollars. You will make a guaranteed million dollars if the home odds are $1.10. In fact I don't know why banks don't bet on such games. It is a far quicker way of earning that amount of money rather than sending it to 19 different countries, 7 different arms dealers, 13 diamond smugglers and 14 separate chinese laundromats.

KRS-ONE FOOLS.

Here's ma alligator haters for round 4
Sydney Roosters 10 Brisbane 32 (11476) *pathetic. Couldn't have happened to a better team.
Souths 10 Bulldogs 34 (34315) ***** awesome (although many would be Bulldogs fans)
Newcastle 12 Melbourne 22 (20051) ****
North Queensland 25 Wests Tigers 24 (21879) *****
Parramatta 38 Canberra 6 Parramatta (10091) **
Penrith 22 Gold Coast Titans 24 (15022) ****
Manly 13 New Zealand 10 Brookvale (16418) *** considering they were unbeaten and playing a decent team they could have done a bit better.
Cronulla 40 Dragons 4 (19137) **** Way to go faggoty arse homos.

Warriors need to win this weekend to reconvince me of a top 4 spot otherwise I might need to re-evaluate things to a top 6 position.

Labels: bourbon, poker, rugby league, super 14, warriors