Saturday, August 07, 2010
Duncan Garner learnt from the master
...and added his own special brand of homophobia for the purposes of mild differentiation.
Labels: duncan garner bigot, TV news
Wednesday, August 06, 2008
National in "we're actually still right wing" shock
Sure, there's more heat than light in the media analysis of the "shocking" revelations that National is still actually a right wing party, and - as in 1990 - are willing to promise a "Decent Society" while secretly-planning vicious neoliberal assaults on the fabric of the country - but it is nice to see the media change tack after countless months of bashing Labour at every opportunity.
A nice breather, really, although I still don't need Duncan Garner and his ilk to tell me who today's winners and losers are.
I already knew Lockwood Smith was a right wing arsehole, for example.
A nice breather, really, although I still don't need Duncan Garner and his ilk to tell me who today's winners and losers are.
I already knew Lockwood Smith was a right wing arsehole, for example.
Labels: media, national, nineties all over again, TV news
Friday, July 04, 2008
Compliant media reports on National being a whiny bitch
Last night TV3 carried two non-truck related politics stories, both fed to them by "poor little rich party National." First, John Key had a whine that someone had put a mildly critical video about him on youtube. Cry me a river. (TV3 anxious to point out link to said video, previously unheard of, available through its site). Second, National complained that members of the public were sending them mass-printed postcards critical of privatization. This correspondence from the public was met with threats of litigation from Bill "bring back the Birch" English. Nice.
Labels: john key, media, national, politics, TV news, whiny bitches
Monday, June 16, 2008
Define irony
Am I right? Are people glued to their TV sets watching the nightly news and closely tracking power savings? Are there lots of computer-generated graphics to detail our savings? Are the news anchors presenting from in front of a huge video screen with bright images? Is the studio brilliantly lit so we can accurately gauge (and reflect?) the concern on the faces of our trusted anchors? Are there multiple cameras being used during the news bulletins that cover the crisis? Are there mobile reporting units down in the South (nice time of year, but chilly) sending up-to-the minute details on lake-levels back to the studio VIA SATTELITE?
Why have I not heard or seen anything saying we should save power by, gulp, turning off the TV?
And stop reading this! Unless you're one of those kids in a developing country with a crank-handle laptop. (Where do I get one of those?)
Why have I not heard or seen anything saying we should save power by, gulp, turning off the TV?
And stop reading this! Unless you're one of those kids in a developing country with a crank-handle laptop. (Where do I get one of those?)
Labels: power generation, TV, TV news
Monday, March 24, 2008
Fuck You TVNZ and Police Checkpoints
These pricks have long had it in for the Warriors and league in general but tonight they stooped to.... well, their usual level. The Warriors got so pissed with their negative coverage that they basically told them to fuck off. And TVNZ make it pretty plain they have no professional integrity. Probably why I only watch TV3 news and flick back and forwards during sports news time to see the bits I want to.
Guess who was hosting the sports news on TVNZ as well? Andrew Saville, rugby commentator. There's no fucken way he wants to give league the time of day in the current climate with union being so shit, getting ratshit crowds and plummeting tv ratings while year after year the NRL crowds remain stable and increase slightly with TV ratings on the up.
So anyway, what exactly do we get on TV1 tonight?
There were two NRL league games yesterday afternoon/evening. The Warriors win over the Eels and in the later kickoff a huge upset in Melbourne with the Storm going down to the Sharks. And what does TV1 do? Well of course they show the incident which saw a player from each team sent off, show none of the tries or give the score and then cut to a game from Saturday night (two days ago) and show a forearm from a Cowboys player which left Hodgson dazed and the offending player put on report. And that's it. And no mention of the Warriors, post match analysis, nothing, the game finished too late to do it the day before.
TV3 of course does not have any bias and showed the tries from yesterdays games along with the foul play incidents in the Storm v Sharks match, and they have comments from Cleary and Wiki after the Warriors v Eels match.
And then low and behold I flick back to TVNZ and they have a 3 minute piece on the Marist rugby club's centenary which would probably have interested a few thousand people nation wide as a nice filler before they go to the weather. And what the fuck is up with previews of the weather forecast, before, and during the regular news before the usual 5 minute weather forecast. You would swear to god that most nights we could revert to the 30 minute news broadcasts we used to have. Although then they would fill it with 10 minute weather forecasts and 7 minutes of Super 14 highlights to slot in betwen ad breaks.
As I mentioned early. Fuck you TVNZ.
I've sent them a bit of feedback and will see what the response is.
Here's some thoughts I had on tvnz in 2006 to help establish a theme of shitness. That reminds me. I sent the NRL website an email on its shit website because it has a million links, takes a while to load and then slows down the operating of your comp. Not to mention there's so much stuff on the front page that you can't find anything. They never replied. But then they did reply when I told them they had ballsed up their ladder crediting the win to the Panthers instead of the Raiders from Saturday night. Talk about a classic example of the too hard basket, ignore it.
And while I'm on bias, or prejudice or persecution or whatever. Why the fuck are the police conducting check points for registration and warrant at the top of my road every couple of weeks (at least) these days. In 5 years of driving in NZ I think I had been stopped 3 times (in the 1990s). But in the past year I have been through a dozen check points up the road and about 8 of them have been in the last few months. Obviously they are catching people but fuck me, I resent to being checked constantly when I am never checked or never see anybody else being checked anywhere else. Maybe if you try another suburb you'll catch people there too. Although in saying that a mate of mine in another 'poor' part of West Auckland has them in his hood all the time as well.
Brothers just can't get a chance. Might have to go out strapped in future.
Guess who was hosting the sports news on TVNZ as well? Andrew Saville, rugby commentator. There's no fucken way he wants to give league the time of day in the current climate with union being so shit, getting ratshit crowds and plummeting tv ratings while year after year the NRL crowds remain stable and increase slightly with TV ratings on the up.
So anyway, what exactly do we get on TV1 tonight?
There were two NRL league games yesterday afternoon/evening. The Warriors win over the Eels and in the later kickoff a huge upset in Melbourne with the Storm going down to the Sharks. And what does TV1 do? Well of course they show the incident which saw a player from each team sent off, show none of the tries or give the score and then cut to a game from Saturday night (two days ago) and show a forearm from a Cowboys player which left Hodgson dazed and the offending player put on report. And that's it. And no mention of the Warriors, post match analysis, nothing, the game finished too late to do it the day before.
TV3 of course does not have any bias and showed the tries from yesterdays games along with the foul play incidents in the Storm v Sharks match, and they have comments from Cleary and Wiki after the Warriors v Eels match.
And then low and behold I flick back to TVNZ and they have a 3 minute piece on the Marist rugby club's centenary which would probably have interested a few thousand people nation wide as a nice filler before they go to the weather. And what the fuck is up with previews of the weather forecast, before, and during the regular news before the usual 5 minute weather forecast. You would swear to god that most nights we could revert to the 30 minute news broadcasts we used to have. Although then they would fill it with 10 minute weather forecasts and 7 minutes of Super 14 highlights to slot in betwen ad breaks.
As I mentioned early. Fuck you TVNZ.
I've sent them a bit of feedback and will see what the response is.
Here's some thoughts I had on tvnz in 2006 to help establish a theme of shitness. That reminds me. I sent the NRL website an email on its shit website because it has a million links, takes a while to load and then slows down the operating of your comp. Not to mention there's so much stuff on the front page that you can't find anything. They never replied. But then they did reply when I told them they had ballsed up their ladder crediting the win to the Panthers instead of the Raiders from Saturday night. Talk about a classic example of the too hard basket, ignore it.
And while I'm on bias, or prejudice or persecution or whatever. Why the fuck are the police conducting check points for registration and warrant at the top of my road every couple of weeks (at least) these days. In 5 years of driving in NZ I think I had been stopped 3 times (in the 1990s). But in the past year I have been through a dozen check points up the road and about 8 of them have been in the last few months. Obviously they are catching people but fuck me, I resent to being checked constantly when I am never checked or never see anybody else being checked anywhere else. Maybe if you try another suburb you'll catch people there too. Although in saying that a mate of mine in another 'poor' part of West Auckland has them in his hood all the time as well.
Brothers just can't get a chance. Might have to go out strapped in future.
Labels: andrew saville, league coverage, TV, TV news, tvnz are shit, weather
Friday, December 21, 2007
Don't Piss in my glass and tell me it's alcopop
Especially not at christmas.
According to the metservice website today is supposed to be sunny and partly cloudy.
Thus far it has drizzled for approximately 4 and a half hours non stop. Well it did stop for about an hour but with cloud as far as the eye can see.
I wonder if they failed to notice the rain radar on their site has had light rain drifting across the Auckland region since day break.
A bloody useful website though nonetheless. Forget what they are telling you is happening or will happen. Just check out the satellite images and rain radar and you get all you need to know. Great for those outdoor paint jobs if you need to know if any rain is coming in the next few hours... Or if you will be cutting through wet wood with a wet saw to build a wet gate in the wet. FUCK! I think I'll just watch daytime TV. Not much of a choice there.
According to the metservice website today is supposed to be sunny and partly cloudy.
Thus far it has drizzled for approximately 4 and a half hours non stop. Well it did stop for about an hour but with cloud as far as the eye can see.
I wonder if they failed to notice the rain radar on their site has had light rain drifting across the Auckland region since day break.
A bloody useful website though nonetheless. Forget what they are telling you is happening or will happen. Just check out the satellite images and rain radar and you get all you need to know. Great for those outdoor paint jobs if you need to know if any rain is coming in the next few hours... Or if you will be cutting through wet wood with a wet saw to build a wet gate in the wet. FUCK! I think I'll just watch daytime TV. Not much of a choice there.
Labels: auckland, diy, metservice, rain, TV news
Wednesday, December 19, 2007
You couldn't make this stuff up
Until about 10 minutes ago I had apparently lost the will to blog. But thankfully the venerable New Zealand Herald has reinvigorated me. When pausing to refill my coffee cup in the lunch room I noticed the following two lift out sections in today's edition:
Carbonwise (Byline - Part 3 of 5: Transport)
Super Wheels (Byline - Speeding Up)
I think Homer Simpson said it best when he once asked: "Do I know what irony means?"
The first of these lift outs (over which I have spilled my coffee in an accidental but strangely satisfying manner) is in large part an advertorial, but it does at least include mention of such things as a supposedly forthcoming 660cc i-Car from Mitsubishi. The second is in even larger part an advertorial, promoting such dubious pleasures as a supercharger kit for your Holden V8, so you too can join the "Fast and the Furious" (actual headline - what happened to the first "the"?)
Do two sections of completely opposed intent constitute balance? I am reminded on an ongoing gripe of George Monbiot. This is what he had to say back in October:
Anyway, back to the august Herald, about which I've taken a few swipes lately, along with many of my disposition. A quick browse of Carbonwise revealed at least one howler. On page 12, under "Trends to Watch" it reports that "Oil is here to stay" and that we should "Forget peak oil - the world is not about to run out of the stuff." Which displays a spectacular absence of understanding of what peak oil is about. Running out of "the stuff" is called ... well, "running out of the stuff", or perhaps something like "resource exhaustion". Peak Oil is the point at which oil extraction reaches its maximum rate, after which supply falls, and it becomes progressively more difficult and more expensive to extract oil from the ground.
Anyway, I'm just back from Australia. Tropical North Queensland to be precise. The night before my second boat trip out to the Reef I saw the following headline on the evening news: "Great Barrier Reef may be gone in 10 years: report." In one sense it affirmed my intention to spend a small fortune visiting it the next day. On the other, I couldn't help wonder about another irony: will the carbon emissions associated with my return flight (Auckland-Cairns), my ground transport (including 4 days behind the wheel of a rented Hyundai Getz with spectacularly bad wheel alignment), and my boat trips, contribute to the Reef's demise?
It wasn't helped the next day when a crew member on board the boat proudly announced we would be burning 1000 litres of diesel to get out to the Reef and back to Port Douglas again.
Fuck irony, I say. Port Douglas is a great town though, and reef snorkelling well worth it. I found Nemo, and a large number of his relatives, for example.
Carbonwise (Byline - Part 3 of 5: Transport)
Super Wheels (Byline - Speeding Up)
I think Homer Simpson said it best when he once asked: "Do I know what irony means?"
The first of these lift outs (over which I have spilled my coffee in an accidental but strangely satisfying manner) is in large part an advertorial, but it does at least include mention of such things as a supposedly forthcoming 660cc i-Car from Mitsubishi. The second is in even larger part an advertorial, promoting such dubious pleasures as a supercharger kit for your Holden V8, so you too can join the "Fast and the Furious" (actual headline - what happened to the first "the"?)
Do two sections of completely opposed intent constitute balance? I am reminded on an ongoing gripe of George Monbiot. This is what he had to say back in October:
The BBC drops Planet Relief for fear of breaching its impartiality guidelines: heaven forbid that it should come out against mass death. But it broadcasts a programme - Top Gear - that puts a match to its guidelines every week, and now looks about as pertinent as the Black and White Minstrel Show. The schedules are crammed with shows urging us to travel further, drive faster, build bigger, buy more, yet none of them are deemed to offend the rules, which really means that they don’t offend the interests of business or the pampered sensibilities of the Aga class. The media, driven by fear and advertising, is hopelessly biased towards the consumer economy and against the biosphere.More recently, on the topic of speed cameras, he took another (deserved) swipe:
Nowhere is more nonsense spoken about this issue than on the BBC. Its Top Gear series has become a sort of looking-glass Crimewatch, in which the presenters enlist the public to help criminals foil the police. There are tips on how to avoid prosecution and endless suggestions that speed cameras are useless or counter-productive. The tone was set in 2002, when the team demonstrated that you could beat the cameras by driving past them at 170mph(5).As an aside, should I feel bad about agreeing with Monbiot, but still really enjoying Top Gear? Nah. Will I watch Top Gear on Prime tonight? Probably. If I do, will I find it to a great laugh? Ahh, yes.
Anyway, back to the august Herald, about which I've taken a few swipes lately, along with many of my disposition. A quick browse of Carbonwise revealed at least one howler. On page 12, under "Trends to Watch" it reports that "Oil is here to stay" and that we should "Forget peak oil - the world is not about to run out of the stuff." Which displays a spectacular absence of understanding of what peak oil is about. Running out of "the stuff" is called ... well, "running out of the stuff", or perhaps something like "resource exhaustion". Peak Oil is the point at which oil extraction reaches its maximum rate, after which supply falls, and it becomes progressively more difficult and more expensive to extract oil from the ground.
Anyway, I'm just back from Australia. Tropical North Queensland to be precise. The night before my second boat trip out to the Reef I saw the following headline on the evening news: "Great Barrier Reef may be gone in 10 years: report." In one sense it affirmed my intention to spend a small fortune visiting it the next day. On the other, I couldn't help wonder about another irony: will the carbon emissions associated with my return flight (Auckland-Cairns), my ground transport (including 4 days behind the wheel of a rented Hyundai Getz with spectacularly bad wheel alignment), and my boat trips, contribute to the Reef's demise?
It wasn't helped the next day when a crew member on board the boat proudly announced we would be burning 1000 litres of diesel to get out to the Reef and back to Port Douglas again.
Fuck irony, I say. Port Douglas is a great town though, and reef snorkelling well worth it. I found Nemo, and a large number of his relatives, for example.
Labels: boy racers, driving, environment, herald, peak oil, stupidification, travel, TV news
Wednesday, September 26, 2007
And another thing...
Both NRT and the Holden Republic marked the centenary of New Zealand becoming a Dominion ("a what?" - Joe Public) to call for a Republic. And good on them: the arguments in favour are, frankly, overwhelming.
But where I part ways with both Idiot/Savant and Lewis Holden is in the characterization of the Governor-General as our "de facto Head of State."
Given that the Governor General is: (a) appointed on the advice of the Prime Minister of the day; (b) exercises executive power only on the advice of this Prime Minister; and (c) is answerable to the Prime Minister ... why not just call a stone a stone, and say the Prime Minister is the de-facto Head of State?? They are the primary representative of the nation, and the Executive branch, at home and abroad.
As I've argued before, I think the Governor General is better characterized as the de jure Head of State's local proxy, who serves at the whim of the de facto Head of State. In other words a diminished figurehead position (notwithstanding the possibility of exceptional circumstances like the dismissal of the Whitlam government).
And another thing: while matters constitutional should be considered, at least from time to time, the TV news media remains obsessed with the internet development de jour: quote online social networking sites like bebo and facebook endquote. For the last two evenings, TV3 has been "reporting" on these sites by about 6:06pm. In other words, they're lead news. On both occasions I shouted at the TV: "reading bebo is not fucking journalism!"
So, yeah, don't expect to learn anything about the merits or otherwise of a Republic on the evening news any time soon.
But where I part ways with both Idiot/Savant and Lewis Holden is in the characterization of the Governor-General as our "de facto Head of State."
Given that the Governor General is: (a) appointed on the advice of the Prime Minister of the day; (b) exercises executive power only on the advice of this Prime Minister; and (c) is answerable to the Prime Minister ... why not just call a stone a stone, and say the Prime Minister is the de-facto Head of State?? They are the primary representative of the nation, and the Executive branch, at home and abroad.
As I've argued before, I think the Governor General is better characterized as the de jure Head of State's local proxy, who serves at the whim of the de facto Head of State. In other words a diminished figurehead position (notwithstanding the possibility of exceptional circumstances like the dismissal of the Whitlam government).
And another thing: while matters constitutional should be considered, at least from time to time, the TV news media remains obsessed with the internet development de jour: quote online social networking sites like bebo and facebook endquote. For the last two evenings, TV3 has been "reporting" on these sites by about 6:06pm. In other words, they're lead news. On both occasions I shouted at the TV: "reading bebo is not fucking journalism!"
So, yeah, don't expect to learn anything about the merits or otherwise of a Republic on the evening news any time soon.
Monday, July 02, 2007
New loser, new winner
To Duncan Garner: you are a complete fuckwit, an indictment on the pure crap TV3 news has become, and your garbled (and now painfully predictable) rants against the government are parochial shit. You have lost all shred of journalist integrity, and are congenitally incapable of providing a fair overview of political issues. "Fair" does not mean bleeting like a blue-ribbon wearing sheep, "labour baaaaa-d, national gooooo-d." Why don't you start turning your sorry-arse career by asking what the resurgent National Party stands for, other than tax cuts, and what effects (good or ill) its policies might have? Perhaps that would be too much for a man of your obviously limited intellectual and professional capabilities. Paul Henry looks talented and well-spoken next to you.
To Wade McKinnon: you are a bloody legend, well played mate!
To Wade McKinnon: you are a bloody legend, well played mate!
Labels: politics, rugby league, TV news
Friday, June 29, 2007
TV3 take note ...
Only cowards with no shred of journalistic integrity lead with Paris Hilton. Frankly, your news editors are fuckwits.
On a cheerier note: some predictions for Round 14.
Knights v Rabbitohs - oh fuck me. Umm, the Rabbits.
Titans v Warriors - without Price, the Warriors look lame. Titans in a close one.
Panthers v Broncos - the Panthers should win given the Origin effect on Brisbane. But I don't think they will. Go Broncos!!!
Raiders v Tigers - could be close. Raiders.
Dragons v Eagles - Eagles.
Dogs v Roosters - Who normally wins when canids take on fowl? Canids of course. Dogs.
Labels: media, rugby league, TV news
Monday, June 18, 2007
Good grief
The standard of TV news in New Zealand is truly plumbing new depths. Last night I had the misfortune to be flicking between TV1 and TV3 coverage (actually, misfortune is an exaggeration - it was actually amusing in a "train wreck" kind of way). Not that there's anything amusing about literal train wrecks of course.
TV3's lead: the daughter ("adopted daughter", sorry) of a former broadcaster, who appeared once or twice as a "model" on a gameshow of ill-repute has been arrested on drugs charges. Public interest value: approximately nil.
That led me to TV1 pretty quickly....
Other stories I saw during the night:
- An All Black talking about taking a crap before the game (honest!)
- A load of shit about a yacht race that is a week away
- An astrologist trying to "predict" outcome of said yacht race. Flip a coin, randominanity style, and you'd be better off.
- 30 seconds coverage of the Warriors win on both channels, with about 15 seconds in each case focussed on Patrick Ah Van dropping the ball.
- A 5 minute advertorial for the rugby world cup at the end of the TV3 news, flogging apartments in Paris and Eurodrive Peugeots.
Update: Day Two of the Millie Holmes Saga
Both TV1 and TV3 led with Millicent last night. And this morning's DomPost reports breathlessly that her hair was "tousled" and she wasn't wearing makeup (the hussy!). I just don't get it ... it's even more pathetic than the "celebrity drugs scandal" the media ran with for months.
Millie isn't a celebrity. Not even an d-grade celebrity like Brent Todd. Rather, she's the daughter of a semi-retired f-grade celebrity. Again, drink-addled journalists' faux-shock over people using (and presumably enjoying) drugs is on display too. (No offence Random).
Meanwhile, even TV3 reporters think their world cup advertorial was crap.
TV3's lead: the daughter ("adopted daughter", sorry) of a former broadcaster, who appeared once or twice as a "model" on a gameshow of ill-repute has been arrested on drugs charges. Public interest value: approximately nil.
That led me to TV1 pretty quickly....
Other stories I saw during the night:
- An All Black talking about taking a crap before the game (honest!)
- A load of shit about a yacht race that is a week away
- An astrologist trying to "predict" outcome of said yacht race. Flip a coin, randominanity style, and you'd be better off.
- 30 seconds coverage of the Warriors win on both channels, with about 15 seconds in each case focussed on Patrick Ah Van dropping the ball.
- A 5 minute advertorial for the rugby world cup at the end of the TV3 news, flogging apartments in Paris and Eurodrive Peugeots.
Update: Day Two of the Millie Holmes Saga
Both TV1 and TV3 led with Millicent last night. And this morning's DomPost reports breathlessly that her hair was "tousled" and she wasn't wearing makeup (the hussy!). I just don't get it ... it's even more pathetic than the "celebrity drugs scandal" the media ran with for months.
Millie isn't a celebrity. Not even an d-grade celebrity like Brent Todd. Rather, she's the daughter of a semi-retired f-grade celebrity. Again, drink-addled journalists' faux-shock over people using (and presumably enjoying) drugs is on display too. (No offence Random).
Meanwhile, even TV3 reporters think their world cup advertorial was crap.
Labels: rugby league, TV news
