blogging it real

Alot has been said and written about me over the past month and I want to clear up a few things before I leave. I am sorry to anyone who I may have offended during my time at the club but there was alot going on behind the scenes that people dont know about. I wanted to leave at the end of 2005 wtih Francis, Monty, Tevita and Feka. The club was going through alot of changes, front office and coaching staff, and you can choose to accept it or move on. I wanted to move on as I felt I needed a fresh start as I started feeling I would get complacent where I was. I expressed to the club how I was feeling and was told that if I stayed I would play 6 and that they would build the club around me. This was exactly the challenge I needed and so decided to give up a test jersey in pursuit of becoming an Integral part of the club. After 2 games I found myself back at 2nd row and was really dissapointed, on top of that I was told that I wasnt worth the money I was on. I gave up a test jumper for what..... then being told that I was overpaid?. The season went on and I wasn't enjoying my footy so I went back to the club and asked for a release, they denied me and started talking me up again, by that time my mind was made up. After awens luncheon i met with officials and was told that no matter how much I played up, they were not going to release me and that everytime I did they would just keep fining me and fining me and a Large suspended fine was put in place hoping to deter me from future mishaps. Angry and frustrated I had to get out and what was to follow was somthing I regret doing but had know choice. When your unhappy, even if it's a 9 to 5 job or playing footy.....YOur unhappy. There is alot more that happend behind the scenes but wont say as it may open up a can of worms and I could get inserious trouble........What the hell. I found out the club was going to brush me next year because I had asked for a release, how they did it to Francis, BATercard. Im off to england now and looking forward to a fresh start, I had several nrl club offers but needed to get away as I would be under as much scrutiny in Oz than back here. Thats what really happend and you people can make up your minds. I feel like a weight has been lifted of my shoulders I wish my brothers and club nothing but sucess next year.