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Wednesday, December 22, 2004

Re-electing Labour in 2005 

I wanted a relatively dramatic title for what's probably my last post of 2004, and this one seems to fit the bill. It follows a fairly positive account of Helen Clark's Prime Ministership by Colin James in the Herald, in which he notes that on Thursday, Clark will surpass Lange as the second-longest serving Labour Prime Minister behind Peter Fraser. So good on her for reaching five years and 13 days, but I'd be pretty pissed off if she wasn't able to challenge such dubious tory records as Bolger (7 years) and Muldoon (8.5 years). And in the spirit of giving free election campaign advice (see my earlier exhortations to one John F. Kerry), I'd like to suggest the following ad to Ms. Clark and her campaign team.

-- Opening Scene: clouds of smoke, distant screams and sirens
-- Scene 2: clouds role back to reveal footage of chaos in Iraq
-- Scenes 3-4: some stock footage of chaos and calamity in Iraq
-- Scenes 5-6: close-ups of fatalities (pref. at least one "white" casualty).
-- Scene 7: white text on black background: Don Brash would have sent New Zealanders to die in Iraq
-- Scene 8: appropriate quote from Don Brash
-- Scene 9: Vote Labour.

Crude, controversial even perhaps, but we all know there's no depths to which Tories won't sink to regain office, so go get 'em and keep New Zealand on a relatively positive track, with a competent ministry and good economic foundations.


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