The Lineup
B.I.R. Column Of Fame
Man of Steel... Wood... and Mud: Bear Grylls
Rock Legend: Tom Morello

League Gods: The Emperor and Alfie

Str-8 Shoota: Malcolm X

Str-8 Shoota: Zack de la Rocha

Super Bad mofo's

Comrade Hillary

Wednesday, June 29, 2005

NZ Herald's New Poll 

The New Zealand Herald today launched a new interactive poll - the question is can you vomit and read at the same time?

Tuesday, June 28, 2005

Where did all my whiskey go? 

We finally managed to polish off the last of the whiskey from our enormous 6? litre bottle of the stuff.

It was first cracked open at my 21st which dc_red may remember many years ago. I think that whiskey cracked a few of us at the time as well.

And what was the great occasion which warranted my father pouring shots (mainly for himself) like there was no tomorrow? Well that would be the All Blacks putting the Northern hemisphere all in their place at once. It's a lot more convenient beating them all at once rather than spreading it over a year or two because there's always some up start that reckons they can beat us if they get the chance.

The All Blacks now have a 103 win, 6 draw, 15 loss record v England, Ireland, Scotland, Wales and the Lions combined.

And we have now won 12 games straight v European opposition.

And extended our record over the Lions to 27 wins, 3 draws and 6 losses.

And what's more in the professional era we have won over 30 times v European opposition and only lost 4 times (2 v England and 2 v France).


Right, I went to the Broncos game which was bloody good. Very enthusiastic effort where they always looked likely. 13,752 showed up to watch the game and the atmosphere was good. Shame more aren't coming out to Ericsson to watch them play this year because sides who aren't doing any better are being better supported at shittier grounds in Aussie.

The average attendances for the season in the NRL has been dropping a bit as the temperatures and rain have done the same. But that tends to happen with most competitions during their middle stages. They should start to pick up again in 3-4 weeks.

Current average is 16,161 for a total of 1,777,670.
Still on track to beat last years average of 14,836 rather comfortably.

Back to the Warriors and the win over the Broncos netted two points that probably weren't banked on so in a way it means they can crop a 50/50 game somewhere along the way and still be in the reckoning.

Such as this weekends Cowboys match in Townsville.

It's a game that they can and maybe should win with their origin stars out but I wouldn't bet on a big Cowboys crowd not cheering their boys home. The Warriors will need to win one of their next three to still be hanging in there but ideally they need two wins and then they will be well placed to make the eight.

Anyway, here's my predictions for the season updated (with bracketed figures current totals):

40 Broncos (26)
38 Eels (22)
36 Cowboys (20)
36 Sharks (22)
34 Roosters (18)
34 Sea Eagles (22)
30 Storm (18)
29 Bulldogs (17)

28 Dragons (18)
28 Warriors (16)
26 Panthers (12)
24 Raiders (18)
20 Tigers (16)
11 Rabbitohs (9)
6 Knights (6)

I think points differential may come into play this year to decide 8th spot with about 3-4 teams likely to be in and around that 28 point mark.

Monday, June 27, 2005


The National Party had its pre-election conference in the weekend and I thought this extract from National law and order spokesman Tony Ryall's speech really hits the nail on the head:

Young people roam the streets of our towns and cities every night. Many of their parents don’t care. Nor are they ever held accountable.

Under a National-led government the young people of this country are finally going to be punished for walking on the streets.

About bloody time.


Further to Friday's blog on the Warriors getting into the top eight this appeared in the Sunday Star-Times over the weekend:
Warriors coach Tony Kemp has set his team a target of six wins from their last 10 games of the season to keep alive their finals chances despite a tough run home.
Kemp believes his side, lying 11th after yesterday's NRL fixtures, still have a "good shot" of finishing in the top eight, despite a four-week run ahead against teams which have all made recent finals appearances. Brisbane visit today, then the Warriors play the North Queensland Cowboys, Bulldogs and Sydney Roosters.
Kemp wants his side to double its tally of 14 points to make it through, and with a bye in the final competition round, that means six more victories.
"We would like to win the lot, but I think 28 points is a good cut-off," Kemp admitted. "We mapped out the final 13 rounds at our mid-season review and the players know the map and are well aware of the games we have targeted to win.
"The players know they are well in with a shot with 11 rounds to go. But it is going to go right down to the wire - and it may come down to points difference. We just have to make sure we continue competing for the eight."

Lets not wait till the last few rounds to get the other five ey boys.

Saturday, June 25, 2005

Oh shit, where did my two points go?! 

Just been doing what I do on a wet weekend day when I'm bored.

Crunching the numbers.

I've gone through the rest of the NRL season and looked at who I think will win each game based on favouritism rather than my gut. And if it all falls this way teams would need 30 points to make the playoffs. Now I have the Rabbitohs and Knights down to lose the rest of their games but I reckon they will both pick up a couple of wins each which means a few teams up the ladder will come back down a few points but I still have a strong suspicion that 26 points will not be enough to make the playoffs. This year seems to be just a wee bit special with two sides doing so poorly and some 'weaker' teams looking set to occupy spots 3-8 meaning some good sides will just dip out.

Here's how it turned out with bracket figures what they are sitting on currently:
42 Broncos (26)
38 Cowboys (20)
38 Eels (22)
36 Sharks (22)
34 Roosters (18)
34 Sea Eagles (22)
30 Storm (16)
30 Dragons (18)
29 Bulldogs (15)
28 Panthers (12)
26 Warriors (14)
22 Raiders (16)
18 Tigers (14)
11 Rabbitohs (9)
4 Knights (4)

Last year the bottom two teams won 11 games and had 2 draws between them, with a combined total of 32 points. This year is going to be way down on that. The Knights and Rabbitohs have 3 wins and a draw and have 13 points between them.

Last year 26 points got the Raiders in but the next team was on 29 (Cowboys) then the Storm were on 30 and the Dragons 32.

In 2003 the Eels and Dragons finished on 26 points and didn't get near the playoffs as the 8th placed Broncos were sitting on 28 points. The bottom two teams had a 10 win, 38 loss record and 28 combined points meaning more points for the sides upstairs.

In 2002 the ladder looks bizarre. 25 points got the Dragons and Raiders home but that was partly thanks to the Bulldogs having 37 points taken from them. The REAL bottom two teams had 32 points between them after managing a combined 12 win 36 loss record.

As I stated earlier, when the bottom teams aren't punching bags for the rest of the league then the playoff points mark comes down. When they are shit and don't pick up so many points it's a higher target to make it.

The more I think about it the more I'm starting to believe that sides will need 30 points to make it unless Johns can fire the Knights to 3 or 4 wins and the Rabbits can find 2 or 3 wins. Even if they do sides will need 28 points in my humble opinion.

You heard it here first.

By the way, I'll update my long term predictions as each week goes by and it gets more concrete.

And for more of my own personal fun here's the hypothetical playoff scenario...

Broncos to beat Dragons
Cowboys to beat Storm
Eels to beat Sea Eagles
Sharks to lose to Roosters

Eels to beat Sharks
Roosters to beat Sea Eagles

Broncos to beat Roosters
Cowboys to beat eels

Peoples Champion: Cowboys


And on a completely different note I can't believe so many (ALL) Blackcaps are happy to go to Zimbabwe. They can say all they like about it not being their decision but at the end of the day they don't have to go. If they opted out everybody would understand. Craig Cumming was interviewed the other day and when asked about what he thought when he saw what was going on in Zimbabwe on TV... he said he changed the channel. Well mate you can bury your head up your arse but unfortunately you are also representing the country and are also saying you have few morals and even less brains.

They are saying they are just cricketers and are just doing their job but would any of us here happily trot off to Zimbabwe because our boss has told us that is where we are working next. Especially when he has told us we are able to opt out of the tour and still be considered for the position next time.

The selectors would be crucified if they didn't select the player or players next time round regardless of what the reason was.

They should never have got into this situation in the first place though. If I was NZ cricket I would keep them home and politely ask the ICC how they reckon they will collect the 2 million dollars we will owe. Especially once we ask them how they would like to try their case in an international court with the human rights lawyers on our side versus the accountants on theirs.

And the ICC needs to stop voting on 'race' lines. It's fucking tired and fucking boring and a fucking disgrace.

Friday, June 24, 2005

It's just a matter of faith....and winning 6/10 

Right as interesting as work is I can't but help spending three-quarters of my time behind the desk trying to calculate how the Warriors can make the play-offs this season.

Currently they're sitting in 11th place on 14 points, but four of the teams ahead of them - Raiders, Storm, Bulldogs, Roosters are on 16 points or less - therefore thay are potentially only a couple of wins away from cementing a top eight position.

With the competition leaders the Broncos sitting on 26 points and second and third - Eels, Sea Eagles - on 22 points there isn't much seperating the field.

So I predict that over the next 11 rounds, the Warriors have a bye in the 26th which equals 2 free points, the team needs to pick up 14 points - or six wins from 10 games - which would put them on 28 points and surely inside the top eight.

Here are their last 10 games and analysis of the matchups.

Broncos at home - Warriors have won the last two home matches albeit against a weakened Storm and the Tigers and also beat the Broncos in Brisbane in round 2. The Warriors have also won 6 of the last 9 against the Broncos and if they can muscle up and come away with a victory on Sunday it will have the added bonus of turning Ericcson Stadium into the fortress it should be - look how confident Manly is when playing at home. Going against them is Brisbane's 11 match winning streak and having Todd Bryne and Louis Anderson out. This'll be a thriller result could go either way.

Cowboys away - This match is a must win for the Warriors as they'll never play a top-four team in a more weakened state. This game also has the potential to interest the gambling community. The Cowboys will have at least four, probably five, frontline stars out of action with State of Origin duty and the Warriors should wallop them. Before State of Origin II the weakened Cowboys were flogged 34-4 by the Dragons. If the Warriors lose this one their season is fucked.

Bulldogs home - The Bulldogs, currently one place ahead of the Warriors on the table, have struggled this season winning five matches, drawing one and losing 7 and they've used up both byes. If they lose this weekend against Manly their season could well be finished and Origin duties could deplete their team for this one. The two teams are yet to meet this season and its another key match for the Warriors - if they nail the Cowboys and can roll the Bulldogs they'll be well placed for a shot at the 8. This should be a test of character. Warriors in with a chance of a win.

Roosters away - The Roosters, like the Bulldogs, are similarly struggling and despite the profile of their players have struggled to put teams away this year. They beat the Warriors at Ericcson by four points in Round 10 in a heartbreaking loss and its time for the Warriors to return the favour. That's easier said than done and this'll be a hard one in the Cock's territory - don't count on two points from this one.

Raiders home - After a flying start to the season the Raiders have got the speed wobbles and lost five on the trot. Their captain Simon Woolford seems intent on getting suspended immediately upon return from suspension and this week they've dropped two of their usual starting players. The Raiders are quickly heading out of the top eight and it would only be right that the Warriors take their place. If the Warriors can't win this they don't deserve to make the finals.

Panthers away - The Warriors record against the panthers of late is woeful and they squeezed the Warriors 8-6 at Ericcson in round 8. The Panthers have a team that could beat any on their day but this season have seemed intent on striving for secondplace. Currently they are sitting third to last on 12 points above only the Rabbits and the Knights. Still, it'll be hard for the Warriors to win in Penrith - don't hold you breath for two points here.

Eels home - The warriors' ranks were seriously depleted when they lost at Hamilton last weekend however the Eels are a good team not a great team and if the Warriors can find form they're in with a chance. After the Bulldogs, Roosters and Broncos over the last few weeks the Warriors will at least be battle hardened and home support could see them through. (Warriors in with a chance)

Storm away - Storm have been struggling this season in home matches losing four of their last five at home but they'll be a stronger pack than when the Warriors beat them before State of Origin II. (Either way)

Knights home - enough said two points.

Sea Eagles away - Eagles haven't lost a match at Brookvale this season and it's hard to see the Warriors upsetting the competition's third placed team away from home.

Should wins/Must wins = Cowboys, Raiders, Knights

Could wins = Bulldogs, Broncos, Eels, Panthers and the Storm

Unlikely to win = Roosters, Sea Eagles

The Warriors must topple 3 of their five could win teams - that's why winning our home matches is so important.

What I like about the draw is they play alot of the teams either above them or close to them on the table which should make leapfrogging them into the top 8 easier.

Also reassuring is that both the Roosters and Storm are facing their third consecutive defeats and the Raiders their sixth - from the bottom of my heart I hope their run of poor luck continues.

Of course my calulations rely on the competition remaining tight and the Raiders continuing their downward streak.

Now for those still reading its time for the world-famous NRL Bennyasena vs NZ Herald Peter Jessup tipping competition:

Round 16 Match-ups
Roosters versus Eels: Jessup - Eels Bennyasena - Eels
Raiders versus Cowboys: Jessup and Bennyasena Cowboys
Panthers versus Knights: Jessup and Bennyasena Panthers
Storm versus Rabbits: Bennyasena and Jessup Storm (could be a close one though)
Warriors versus Broncos: Jessup Broncos Bennyasena Warriors
Dragons vs Tigers: Jessup and Bennyasena Dragons
Eagles vs Bulldogs: Jessup Bulldogs Bennyasena Eagles

To date after 96 matches Jessup leads the count with 55/96 while Bennyasena is biding his time on 51/96.

Top Eight Team Predictions:

Broncos - Eels - Sea Eagles - Dragons - Cowboys - Warriors - Storm - Sharks

Live Punga Trees 

Three for 10 dollars.

That appears to be the going rate on as at 9:55am, Friday the 24th. Which just happens to also be a day when I have two assignments due. Luckily for me and of no concern to you I have finished both of them, though one was a shite effort considering it's worth 60% of the years mark. Nevermind.

I was looking through trademe to see how much Nikau's are going for and it's the same freakin handful of traders selling them each time and for crap money as well. There's one guy trying to sell three fairly mature ones for several hundred bucks. He's been trying to get rid of them for ages now. Another "professional horticulturist" has been selling the same shitty three (think he just uses the same photo) for months.

My computer is starting to sound like a lawn mower.

That's OK though, it will drown out the fridge motor, which is drowning out the sound of my dripping gutter onto my soon to be ripped up deck.

Predictions for the weekend. Well I'll go for the Warriors in a tight one over the Broncos. I have the freebie tickets available to me but have to toss up whether or not I'll spend the day preparing a presentation for early next week which I HAVE to pass to get through the paper. I think I'll go watch the Warriors. After all, it is their big ten year thing and I was sitting there in the main stand when it all began and we were nearly blown away by a door which exploded 50 metres off a car in the centre of the field. If it wasn't for that dumb bastard that let 5 replacements on the field in a game we had won v the Magpies we would have made the playoffs in the first freakin year and could have been away laughing.

Not really sure about the ABs v Lions. We are prone to getting a bit nervy in the days and hours leading up to big tests despite talking ourselves up for weeks, and often for good reason. The All Blacks have often failed to perform in big games when expectations are high. But let's be honest. Our record v the Lions is awesome and it's for obvious reasons. Firstly we always play them at home and secondly it is a put-together-team that we are up against. Woodward is showing a clear English bias which can only mean he isn't picking the very best side and can only be good for the ABs. Whether we win or not is another question but if we can get half the ball, half the field position and quick ball I think we should win by 10 points plus.

In my opinion it will depend on who can jump out to an early lead. Especially one of about 10 points. The Lions ill defend very well so we are going to need our looseforwards and Mealamu to punch holes and our backs to rip them to shreds early on. if we can rattle in a couple of early tries their arse could fall out. If it stays tight for a long period then it could come down to who pops over a couple of second half kicks.

And what's with us saying the weather will suit the Lions cos it's going to be so cold and crap?

I mean isn't the game being played in New Zealand?

We do get weather like this don't we?

It does snow in New Zealand doesn't it?

We do get howling freezing winds don't we?

It is often close to our below freezing down south isn't it?


I've been to ol' blighty and the weather may not be flash but having worked for 6 weeks in the great London outdoors over May and June with one day of rain I'd say they know what sun is. I was watching the spectators sweat their arse off at Wimbledon last night with our words about how the test weather might be more up the Lions alley ringing in my ears and thought we can be a bit gay at times.

Anyway, ABs by 10 with the Lions getting the last points of the game.

Avocadoes 3 for a dollar 

I thought the world might like to know about that ... well, at least Dunedinites being offered this most succulent of fruits for $5.80 a piece. Yep, life is pretty cheap here in Vancouver (err, in a good way).

I should keep a tally of such things (prices in Canadian dollars, add about 10% to convert to NZD). For starters, gas (petrol) can still be found for about 90c/l, although it's definitely heading upwards. A new rental car for 9 days is about $240. If you're into Calcium, Multivitamin, Vitamin C tablets, and other supplements to get you through life/winter in one piece, packs of 100 are just a couple of dollars. Cocktails at the bar are $6.

Beer and wine from the retailer are more expensive, but with my avocado-related savings I can live it up large and still have money in my pocket.

Tuesday, June 21, 2005

Faster, safer, wealthier, healthier 

Wow, holy shit here I was all muddled up about who I am going to give my vote to this year when I heard a decent sounding man by the name of Don Brash speaking on the radio this morning - leader of the National Party apparently.

Under a National Government not only will hard working young Kiwis like myself get a tax cut - that I can then funnel through to my student loan - but also our roading/transport systems are going to be upgraded and revamped which means no more rush-hour traffic for me.

Under a National Government that means getting home to watch the Simpsons at 5 will become more than just a dream, it will become reality.

Even more money than the present Government has allocated is to be spent on health and this can only be good for all New Zealanders.

The defence forces will also be adequately resourced (at last) which means we can all sleep easier at night knowing that the Axis of Evil is being held at bay.

Ditto the police.

They'll receive every extra resource they could ever have dreamt of and this means my car stereo will be safer at night.

Sure he was a little short on specifics but Don also promised that biosecurity will be enhanced which means no more pesky hoax letter writers.

What's more if you give National your vote New Zealand is almost guranteed a a free trade deal with the United States.

Unfortunately, Don admitted there was one possible downside.

Monday, June 20, 2005

New Legend 

Time for a new legend me thinks.

Friday, June 17, 2005

NRL Round 15 


Sharks versus Roosters - Bennyasena Roosters New Zealand Herald league reporter Peter Jessup Sharks.


Broncos vs Tigers - both Broncos

Eels versus Warriors - Bennyasena the mighty Warriors Jessup the slippery Eels.

One thing that pisses me off about league writers or perhaps headline writers in league - every time the Knights lose it is referred to as a Knightmare, if we play the Eels they're slippery - the Storm "is brewing" when they play. Enough of the lame puns already.

Storm vs Panthers - both Storm.

Rabbits vs Dragons - both Rabbits believe it or not.
Bulldogs vs Raiders - both Bulldogs.
Eagles vs Knights - both Eagles.

Thursday, June 16, 2005

Child Labour 

Earlier today I saw a girl of about 5 struggling to put the Western Leader in my mailbox. She dropped it and it kind of fell apart. I then watched with a smile on my face through the window as she tried to reasemble it but to no avail. But never fear, her older sister (aged about 8-9) came to her rescue. All she had to do was put down her three year old sister, tidy up the newspaper and shove it in the box. Then she picks up the three year old in one arm and grabs the pushchair in the other before proceeding onto the next house where the aforementioned 5 year old was headed.

What the?!

Where was mum? Studying for 5th form exams I suppose?

Tuesday, June 14, 2005

Results, reviews and rugby league 

It's official parents can once again relax and let their kids play at Michael Jackson's place.

In other news the Warriors are looking good for a finals place with some of the current top 8 teams: Raiders/Sharks and dare I say it Eagles starting to look a little shaky.

Heading down to Waikato Stadium this Saturday for a key match for the Warriors against the Eels - go the Warriors.

NZ Herald league reporter Peter Jessup's tips for Round 14 were:

Tigers vs Sharks: Tigers 1/1
Raiders vs Broncos: Raiders 1/2
Rabbits vs Eagles: Eagles 1/3
Knights vs Eels: Eels 2/4
Warriors vs Storm: Warriors 3/5
Dragons vs Cowboys: Dragons 4/6.

Bennyasena collected 3/6 so Jessup sits on 50/89 Bennyasena 48/89.

I'm tipping NSW for tommorrow night's State of Origin II which looks set for some brawls - thank god.

I was reading some wanker pansy columnist over in Aussie who was criticising the Footy Show's presenters for reliving some of their State of Origin fight highlights in the build up to the first game -"there's no place for thuggish violence and this kind of machoism in State of Origin football," he wrote.....

Yeah right, fuck off back to your latte.

Having spent seven days in Australia recently I now feel qualified to list some of the advantages and disadvantages of living in New Zealand.

Brisbane - superior weather
Brisbane - inferior coffee
Brisbane - superior rugby league newspaper coverage (up to a dozen articles a day)
Brisbane - superior public transport
Brisbane/Australia generally - inferior beer
Brisbane - can still buy avocados
Brisbane - Inferior newspaper coverage generally - The number of stories I read about fat people losing weight and animals that recovered against all odds....

Monday, June 13, 2005

Oh the humanity/hilarity 

Scenario 1: Dunedin Airport, 6.20am on a frosty Wednesday, a light frost has settled. Just before scheduled 6.50am departure an eerie voice is heard: "Attention passengers, due to ice on the runway, planes are unable to depart. We will have to wait for the sun to come up and hope the increased temperature melts the ice." The sun is not due to rise until 8.05am. Delayed passengers are left to ponder how airports in cold places around the world manage ... you know, with salt trucks and all. And it's not like frost is unheard of in these parts.

Scenario 2: EnergyAustralia Stadium, a lonely Knights fan - watching his team rapidly becoming the worst in the competition in two decades, and in the process of receiving the equal-heaviest defeat in its history - has a beer and takes matters into his own hands seeking to stop Parammatta scoring a try. Parramatta players reported hearing the man say, "don't arrest me - someone's got to make a tackle" as he was led away. Priceless.

Sunday, June 12, 2005

Back Baby! finally loads up after 10 fucking minutes!!!

Right. I'm on 'holiday' after being out sampling students for 4 weeks. Though 4 assignments in the next 4 weeks will sort me out. Sheer bliss though compared to the 5 in 3 days last term.

Went to the All Blacks v Fiji game on Friday night on a whim. My wife wanted to see Daniel Carter up close and when he was in action in our corner early on she said "we can go now". We stayed and actually watched some of the game as well. Though 90% of the block we were in spent more time looking at the scuffles on the embankment and certainly nobody spent any time actually talking about the game. It was a shame that the All Blacks have got so slick in the professional era while countries like Fiji and Samoa (as we saw on Saturday v a goo but not great Wallabies) are still playing in the amateur era. Stephen Jones was talking his usual absolute tripe in the Sunday Star today. He manages to blame everything on NZ including the Fijians performance as though we are somehow responsible for the crap play of the pacific island teams. Perhaps he might like to take a look at where half of the fucking players learnt to play rugby to a good level. Or maybe he wants to look at who was getting money from the gate takings. Or maybe he wants to turn his attwention to the IRB who are actually the ones responsible for funding the game in the weaker countries. Or hell, maybe he wants to look at the northern hemisphere teams who often won't even release their players for full internationals, or talk their foreing players into turning down the jersey.

Staying on Stephen Jones for a minute. I know he is writing for a snobby British reader but if they seriously go along with his writing then they have no idea of rugby whatsoever. He's deliberately proviocative but it's a broken record with little or no intelligence at all. he excused the inept Lions performance by basically saying that it wasn't their test side. Well so fucking what mate?! It was one of teh strongest sides they could have put out there and they were absolute shit. Woodward has also come out and said he saw good things and they will win the tests. Well maybe you will Sir Clive but what exactly were the good things?

In 80 minutes they threatened the NZ Maori line about twice perhaps? Excuse me if I'm wrong again but isn't the whole point of the game to try and get near the opposition line and score some tries? And isn't 80 whole fucking minutes long enough to do that? Their scrum looked good and times and average at times. Their lineout was woeful and if fatty is going to look good at hooker in the scrums he might want to try looking good throwing the ball into the lineout as well. They were dicked at the breakdown, got no ball, didn't fire a shot in the backline, Jones kicked with no tactical plan at all it seemed and they split the ball constantly. The only good thing I could see that the Lions did was that they defended well. But if they faced a slightly higher class of game breakers (like exist in the ABs) they would quite possibly have lost last night by 40 points.

Wilkonson will be in the first test side for sure unless somebody cripples the poor bastard in his one or two hitouts before the first test. And he will be key for them. They are certainly going to have a solid platform at the scrum and they will probably win 90% of their lineout ball and a bit of ours, and they will disrupt the AB ball and Wilkonson will kick nicely into the corners and nicely through the sticks and they will defencd staunchly. So the ABs will need to crack the Lions early and skip out to leads of 12+ in the first half an hour in my opinion. I think they team that can get the lead will be very hard to overcome in these games. Kind of goes without saying but you see teams defensing a lead lift a lot more than they do when they are behind.

Right. That's more than enough rugby.

I went to the Warriors today. My 5th time this year and I still haven't paid to gat in muhahahaha! They played bloody well and at 24-16 the score severly flattered the Storm. The Warriors looked slick on attack and should have wrapped it up on the break with Jones falling centimetres short (or did he scratch that line?) to potentially have put them out 26-4. then they came within inches of scoring twice more after the break and then again later in the match.

How the fuck the video ref came up with a penalty try is not beyond me beacuse the video ref is a cheating c*nt like he always is v the Warriors. The Warriors NEVER, EVER, EVER get any 50/50 calls from the video ref. Go back and check. They would lose every fucking one of them. And when was the last time a penalty try was awarded?! I have seen plenty of times a lot closer than that when player has been tackled before catching the ball when all he had to do was fall over and all the refs do is bin the tackler and award a penalty. That was a disgrace and to make it even worse he watched it over and over again in SLOW-FUCKING-MOTION!!! Calvin Cronk or whatever the fuck his name is would have had to have had wings come out his arse to have rounded up that kick and grounded it.

Anyway justice was done and the refs couldn;t even manage to fuck things up. The touch judge on the camera side of the field needs an eye re-alignment with all the forward passes he missed and where was the benefit of the doubt to the attacking team with Toopi's grounding of the ball?

Look out for the situation with the refs v the warriors to blow up in coming weeks as there will be several tight games for sure. The Warriors have the Eels, Broncos, Roosters and Cowboys coming up and even 4 points would be a decent effort and keep them in the hunt for the playoffs. They have a good chance of picking up 8 points in their last 4 weeks so if they can work themselves into copntention I think they have the team and the attitude to get there.

Points table with adjustments for bye points...
Broncos 22 (127)
Eels 18 (75)
Sea Eagles 18 (29)
Cowboys 16 (62)
Dragons 16 (36)
Sharks 16 (2)
Storm 14 (127)
Warriors 12 (33)
Roosters 12 (23)
Raiders 12 (-26)
Wests Tigers 12 (-30)
Bulldogs 9 (-45)
Panthers 8 (-34)
Rabbitohs 7 (-129)
Knights 0 (-250)

I told you the Sea Eagles were gonna crap out some time. Title contenders can get dicked by 40 points and still come back later in the year.

Except when it's by SOUTH SYDNEY RABBITOHS 44-6 muhahahahahaha!!!!!

Although they do have the Knights (poosibly the worst side the comp has seen in two decades) next week at Brookvale followed by the Bulldogs, Tigers and Panthers. All the cellar dwellars. If they can come through that wil 6 points I think I'll have to admit defeat and allow them a place in my top 8.

Saturday, June 11, 2005

New Legend 

Dave Dobbyn, proud owner of a new website, new album, and title of all-round New Zealand rock legend. Not to mention "Welcome Home", the new single which provides a wonderful antidote to the Winston Peters Brigadge and their reprehensible scare-mongering, slandering, and pandering to base fears. Dave's song's good enough to start a riot on Queen Street, what with it looking like Hong Kong and all. :)

The All Blacks vs Fiji was a good laugh, wasn't it, and a useful reminder that there are only about 7 or 8 competitive teams in the world of test rugby. Jim Kaves points out it's not Fiji's fault they "are starved of games and resources. That fault lies with the IRB which takes every penny it can from the World Cups but seems to do nothing with it." They certainly don't use it to build their own poxy stadia, or anything resembling an international game. Kaves concludes, thoughtfully, that the whole exercise was "sad for Fiji, bad for rugby and largely a waste of time." Well said.

Update: Graham Reid at Public Address has an incisive piece on the media's mid-winter "silly-season", complete with the following comments:
I can live without the daily drip-feed of Barmy Army stories, what some blokes on the West or East Coast thinks about our team, the articles about women supporters of the Lions, the photo shoots of players going about their PR business, and so on. [...]

Consider this from statement from Brendan Telfer on Radio Sport: "It's part of our ethos, that every man, woman and child is behind the All Blacks whenever they play."


I for one am looking to profit from betting on the Lions to win. As for "media stories we'd like to see" ... with the fortunes of National and NZF on the rise, I'd like to see an investigation of what types of people are likely to make it into Parliament on their lists.

Thursday, June 09, 2005

NRL Round 14 

OK this'll be brief because I'm in sunny Queensland - the heart and soul of rugby league.

I'll update Jessup's picks next week and blog about the little differences between NZ and Queensland.

Wests vs Sharks - Bennyasena Sharks
Canberra vs Brisbane - Bennyasena Brisbane
Newcastle vs Eels - Bennyasena Eels
(Sydney Morning Herald is reporting the Knights are close to folding and players in danger of going unpaid which can't foster team morale)
Souths vs Manly - Bennyasena Manly
Warriors vs Melbourne - Bennyasena Warriors
St Geroge vs Cowboys - Bennyasena Cowboys (although with Origin next week both teams are seriously different so, who knows?)

Sunday, June 05, 2005

Can you cheer and vote at the same time? 

There's been quite a lot of speculation lately about the possible date of the next election, and fair enough too. Potential dates are being debated all over the place, like here and here. Fine, I like a bit of idle speculation as much as the next guy. But what does it say about this country that the an All Blacks game somehow disqualifies the day it falls upon as an election date? Will the people of Dunedin refuse to vote if the election is held on August 27? Would the people of Auckland similarly rebel on the following Saturday, September 3?

Unless I'm mistaken rugby union is a sport followed by many - but certainly not all, and perhaps not even a clear majority - people in this country, and the game takes about 80 minutes to play. Allow 2 hours to take care of the build-up, stoppages, and half-time etc. That still allows a decent 10 hours for voting.

If the people of New Zealand can't watch a game and vote on the same day, they probably shouldn't have been enfranchised in the first place.

You know, other countries hold elections on days when ... shock horror, most people also have to go to work! Like Mondays! And Tuesdays!

We seem to lack any sense of perspective on this. At the rate the NZRU and their cronies are expanding the Union season, they'll never be time for an election. Nope, can't have it on Saturday January 3rd, that will be the second round of the Super 27, with the mighty Dunsandel Prairie Dogs up against the Huntly Havoc.

Finally, an intelligent comment on the issue of rugby players' drinking can be found here. Notice it makes no use of the facile argument that the players are somehow role-models for something other than "catching a ball and running with it, or stopping others doing the same". The point is that drinking and athleticism don't fit well together. Serious athletes don't drink while in training or competition. Simple as that.

Friday, June 03, 2005

A bit of mongrel 

A couple of things I've been wanting to mention. First, the ad for this guy's talkback show on radio live.


He delivers a smartarse monologue about NCEA, suggesting that it prevents children from being told they're failures. Not like in the good old days! Listen up, chump, for each NCEA assessment there is the standard known as "not achieved". Now while this may lack the sheer emotional shock value of an "F" (or being made to stand in the corner wearing the dunce's cap) it is also very clear: you, Student X, have failed to achieve the necessary standard. That sends as clear as message as is required, I would have thought. And it sure beats a system which compels 50% of students to fail each and every year (do you remember the glory days of School C, UE and Bursary, Paul?)

Second point: time for Labour to respond to National's provocative billboard campaign. Like this perhaps (Hat tip: NRT).

Or (and I'd do this myself if I had access to the proper software)




I wonder how many Labour MPs now agree with that the budget was a lost opportunity?

Six months ago I suggested Labour could do two things to help ensure a successful re-election: 1) Cut taxes 2) Attack Brash. Unfortunately they're doing neither, and without wanting to sound like a smartarse, I think it's showing in the polls.

Get stuck in ya mongrels!

NRL Round 13 

The punters are out in force this weekend - one guy's bet $35,000 on the Bulldogs to beat the Rabbits with a minus 16.5 point start.

Only the Panthers stopped me picking up the perfect 7/7 in round 12 - and they blew a 20-point lead against Manly - unfortunately the NZ Herald's league reporter Peter Jessup got six out of seven too and remains one point ahead of this fearless tipster.

Jessup is on 46/83 Bennyasena 45/83

Aussie punters have also waged more than $25k on the Dragons to beat the Warriors with a minus 8.5 start - they obviously haven't heard that 1) it's a "matter of faith" and 2) the Warriors have nearly the best defence in the competition.

Unfortunately the king of ill-discipline Monty high-shot keen-for-a-brawl Betham is not only back from suspension but is captaining the team too.

Fans can only pray his attitude won't be contagious.

In saying that the Warriors are hitting their straps and at $3.30 I reckon are good for a punt. Or take them with the 10.5 start at $1.87...easy money.

Round 13 matches

Roosters vs Manly - Jessup Roosters Bennyasena Manly

Cowboys vs Sharks - both Cowboys
Bulldogs versus Rabbits - both Bulldogs
Dragons vs Warriors - Jessup Dragons Bennyasena Warriors

Tigers vs Storm - both Storm
Panthers vs Eels - both Panthers
Knights vs Broncos - both Broncos

Wednesday, June 01, 2005

Justice is served... 

The Court of Appeal has overturned an Auckland restaurateur's convictions for sex offences against four young men while they were under the influence of drugs. Phillip David Sturm had pleaded guilty to eight charges of supplying ecstasy and amphetamines and was found guilty by a jury on 10 sex charges. The High Court trial judge directed the jury to acquit Sturm on charges of stupefying the complainants. The Court of Appeal has accepted a Crown appeal against that direction. It also quashed his sex offence convictions. Sturm will face a new trial on both the sex and stupefying charges.

Good job.

You can't tell me guys in their 20s pop pills with an obviously gay guy accept rides in his Porsche around town and then go back to his apartment with him and expect nothing's going to happen.

And Christ he was giving them ecstacy and speed which are hardly fucking stupefying - try electrifying.

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